There's your girlfriend!

Used as a joke to rip on friends when you see an ugly girl or old lady. substituting a family member for girlfrined is also very effective:

say to friend as you point to a homeless person on the street: "Hey, there's your cousin."

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torquing

To get an erection, once erection is achieved the man is torqued.

Billy: Man Jessica's tits get me so torqued!
John: Yea! Here she comes now, I'm totally torquing.

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