pubify

to pubify: to cast ancient, forbidden and cursed magic to quite literally, turn things directly in to a single quantifiable pube. This magic was first discovered in the beam stream in 2022 but many scholars believe it's origins predate even that. Immense and intensive research is done on a daily basis by the worlds best pubification excavators

He said he will pubify his nan if he doesn't get VIP status. monkaS

Royal Fail

When Royal Mail employees are so lazy that they expect to deliver parcels late for £10+ per hour otherwise they collectively don't bother turning up to work at all creating the Royal Fail.

Joe: "Yo, Dave, did you get round to buying those creps for your missus?"

Dave: "Nah, mate. Otherwise I'd be waiting over a month for the Royal Fail to deliver them, better to go with UPS"