Coondawg

An aging Harlem dweller. A Coondawg by nature likes to think that he/she is very cool, knowledgeable and quite politically correct in order to cover all bases with friends. Coondawgs tend to be on the higher end of middle-agedom and in great attempts to recapture their youth will resort to dating younger women, cheating on their wives, playing water polo or going on adventures to stupid places like Mexico for example. Coondawgs rarely allow their vulnerabilities to show and will not allow themselves to ever be seen in a negative light. Their Facebook will show only their smart and cool side. Any pictures that appear to show the Coondawg looking like a dog with his head out of the window will have their comments deleted immediately. Anyone who allows themselves to even be called a "Coondawg" once they've reached legal drinking age should be reconsidering their entire lives anyway.

"Yo, Andy, what's up bro?"
"Dude, you will address me by my cool name, "Coondawg!"
"Yea dickwad, whatever. Yo, you should get your daughter some Proactive."
"That's my girlfriend...."

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coon-perro

The Mexican version of Coondawg...the Coonperro displays similar traits of his American counterpart. Tequilla may or may not have an effect on Coon-perro but he hopes it has an effect on the younger senoritas that vacation in Mexico.

Coon-perro suffers from both a midlife crisis and a sexual confusion when confronted with ANYONE in a bathing suit. Posting pictures of himself in hot tubs with young tourists on Facebook furthers the concern. Its an embarassing situation at best. Only to be deflected by insane rants and random facts about Henry Paulson. Fear the educated man.

Monica: "Awwwwwk-ward!!!! Shout out to the guy who tried to pick up me and my father at the pool today #awkward #gay #waterpolo #coon-perro #doglips #headoutthewindow #midlife crisis

Andy: "Check me out with chicks...im not gay" #b.s. #lying #gay #snoopy #tight waterpolo swim trunks #rainbow #harlem #Henry Paulson #midlife crisis #im cool really i am.

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