defrag token

A "defrag token" is a fictitious license or currency required to execute the windows "Defrag" program. The token does not exist, but can be used to help limit a (l)user's defragging in futile attempts to improve the performance of their system.

It has a secondary effect of pre-flagging unwary users for the IT support staff -- similar to the purpose of a left-handed ethernet cable.

(l)user: my computer is slow, I'm gonna run "defrag" a few times to fix it.
BOFH: k, but you better stock up on defrag tokens
(l)user: good idea!
...
(l)user (to helpdesk): I need a bunch of defrag tokens, I'm saving you guys lots of time
helpdesk: wtf?

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snackie

like a foodie, but less serious and more snack-oriented.

M: are you a foodie?
A: nah, I just like snacks -- I'm a snackie. I'm havin some kkultarae flown in from Korea. Can you hook me up with another batch of bhakarwadi from Pune?

10👍 4👎

lurk fail

When someone tries to lurk but utterly fails to do so anonymously. Constantly changing their messenger status, or disconnecting / rejoining IRC channels.

20:33 -!- <noob> has joined #some-channel
20:33 < noob> logger url
20:33 <@coolguy> lurk fail

kiss the ring

Euphemism for licking or kissing the rectal opening. Historical reference includes kissing the king's hand as a tribute or gesture of thanks, in return for being granted special access or position.

"We won't be allowed to do this until we 'kiss the ring'"

39👍 61👎

freedom soda

a french variant of italian soda. consists of torani syrup, soda water, ice, and milk.

The "freedom" moniker is used because calling it "french" would be unamerican.

Like the freedom enjoyed by this drink's namesake, Freedom Soda is best made from borrowed talent (ie, stolen ingredients)

A: hey R, did you check otu the cherry vanilla freedom soda?
R: yeah, it was the bomb

mint

unit of time, equal to 60 seconds

Boss: you can do it later
Lackey: i can do it now, it will take few mints.