iNeedy

The mental state of paralysis, anxiety and even panic that requires technical support for the simplest tasks involving the correction of any computer or electronic malfunction.

Jane: "Dick, come quickly! My wireless remote entry has a dead battery and I can't get into my car!!!"

Dick: "Jane, you're so iNeedy, just use the key in door lock."

Hood Thumper

Hood Thumpers are those curiously tame rabbits that come looking for a snack under the bird feeder in your urban back yard. It's not clear where they come from or where they live, but they have a greater cuteness factor than that of the urban squirrel.

Bob: "Hey Tom, your cats are freaking out on the back porch, what's up with that?"

Tom: "Oh, they're really into those Hood Thumpers that are grazing beneath the bird feeders. Be careful when you step out or you'll trip over one!"

Humpday Foreplay

Tuesday

Bill: "Hey ted, tomorrow's Humpday. Are you going to make it to the local brew pub for mug club night?"

Ted: "That all depends on how things go during Humpday Foreplay, but I'm otherwise up for it!"

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TFOD

Total Fuck Off Day. A day that could be spent mowing the yard, paying the bills, running errands, hanging out with friends or family, cleaning the house - but is, instead, spent in a total state of reclusive and meditative relaxation while shutting out the chaos of the rest of the world.

Ted: Hey bill, did you spend memorial day finishing that massive landscaping project like you said you would?

Bill: No, Ted, I didn't. I decided to enjoy a TFOD instead. It was awesome!

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