I couldn't stop the swimmers

The simultaneously unfortunate and wonderful feeling that is premature ejaculation

Randy: And then I got in there and it felt soooo sweeet!!
Wally: DUDE!!!
Randy: She looked me in the eye, whispered my name and I couldn't stop the swimmers!!!
Wally: You bitch! Control your jizz!

You couldn't catch chicken pox in a henhouse!

A less explicit version of "You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse!" It means that no matter how hard they try, no one will be able to catch anything.

While a pack of dogs chased a cat, the cat insulted them by saying, "You couldn't catch chicken pox in a henhouse!"

Things couldn't get any worse

A magical phrase that makes things get worse.

Dave during 2021: Things couldn't get any worse, right?
Dave: *turns on the tv* A new virus called "Air Aids" has appeared. It originated in San Francisco and started spreading through Atlanta. If you're homosexual, you already have it, and you're gonna die. All straight people and non-faggots shall remain indoors until we get it sorted out.
Dave: Of course. Things CAN get worse.

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