Cover and Hover

When you enter a public restroom and it's so disgusting that not only do you lay a seat cover down, but you hover over it too.

"I went to the public restroom at the beach and I couldn't tell if the seat had water droplets or pee droplets on it, so I decided to cover AND hover."

loaf cover

The first slice in a bag of bread, usually the heel or first one or two slices, that everyone reaches past to get to the fresher ones as the bread gets eaten.

Awww, damn, I wanted a sandwich but we're down to just the heel and the loaf cover!

Hoove covers

a large persons foot covered with a sock....to prevent the noice during a stampede. to prevent those embarassing moments at the beach

Honey put on your hoove covers before you scratch the new hard wood floors.

duvet cover

An item bought at stores like Bed Bath & Beyond. Its exact nature and purpose remains a mystery to single men. The only way to uncover its manifold secrets is to marry a woman, and then be forced to go shopping for one.

Friend: Hey! You wanna hang out?
Newly-wed man: Sorry, man. We have to go shopping for a duvet cover.
Friend: What the hell is that?
Newly-wed man: I dunno, but apparently we need one.

18👍 3👎

covering shorts

(FINANCE) the situation in which a derivatives trader with a short position is wrong about the behavior of the market. Having sold shares of stock he doesn't own, he is now compelled to buy them at a higher price than he sold them for (in order to reimburse whomever he borrowed the shares from).

If the short position was taken by writing naked options (i.e., issuing call options of stock the trader doesn't happen to have), then the trader has to buy shares of underlying stock in order to honor the options.

It's extremely expensive for traders to have to cover their shorts.

The surprising stock rally came as a shock. Nicholas Leeson had been riding high, but now he was furiously covering shorts, and driving the share prices higher still. By closing bell, he was ruined.

17👍 3👎

Squirrel Covers

A pair of womens' panties. A woman's bush is hairy like a squirrel, hence, why they call them squirrel covers.

I want to sniff her sweet smelling squirrel covers.

78👍 24👎

Seat Cover

Trucker talk for a cute girl driving down the road.

Breaker breaker 1-9 . . . there's a seat cover heading south on I-5 outside of Salem in a silver volkswagon.

43👍 12👎