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The car of choice for broke hipsters on the American west coast. Rides like a lifted Ford Ranger and has fuckall creature comforts or performance, but is notorious for reliability and can do 300-400k on one engine with good upkeep. Stupidly boxy styling. Comes in wagon, sedan and coupe variants (in order of desirability).
My coworker Mike picked up a Volvo 240 wagon with 350k for $2000, what a hipster
6👍 5👎
People who walk along in a shopping mall unable to walk in a straight line and who will suddenly and without warning stop to look at something in a shop window or change direction requiring people who are following to step sideways to avoid bumping into them.
Holy shit! watch where the hell you are going you stupid fucking volvo walker, you!
8👍 8👎
Being the safest cars on earth, and upscale too, gives authority for us, to speed through 30 mph above the limit, turn to Whole Foods without a blinker, never stop, and pretend to drive over a person , scare them, but get stopped by our passenger detection system.
Suck it BMW. Respect mah Volvo authoritah!
-New S60 drives at 70 mph on WF parking lot-
Guy on street: Ahhhhhh
-car stop s automatically-
Driver: RESPECT MAH VOLVO AUTHORITY!
Someone who drives a Volvo (a car brand that has always marketed themselves with safety). They are usually bad drivers and create a hazard for other drivers. Typical behaviors include driving well below the speed limit, failing to park properly, and more.
Volvo cars are poorly built, and ironically, can be very dangerous despite their safety focused marketing. Issues like brake and suspension failures often lead to crashes.
The guardrail was damaged after a Volvo driver hit it.
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The Volvo XC90 is a mid-size 3-row family SUV produced by the Swedish car company, Volvo. (This vehicle was also one of the 2 Volvos which were available with a Yamaha-built V8 engine.) Volvo has a large reputation for safety, especially after inventing that 3-point safety belt. Speaking of safety, the first generation XC90 for the 2003 model year was available with a Blind-Spot Information System. (aka BLIS for short) Using cameras and radar technology under the driver and passenger door mirrors, the vehicle could warn you of a vehicle in another lane when changing lanes. It is also one of many Volvos (and one of the very few cars overall) which could withstand being able to ramp yourself off a bridge, be 100 feet in the air, and literally land on its side on a thick sheet of ice and you would still be able to walk after. (And if you're wondering, yes this did happen and yes they were able to walk.)
*major car accident between Prius and XC90 V8*
Prius Lady: "Your car totaled mine! And I hit you!"
XC90 Driver: "Well to be fair, I am driving a Volvo XC90, and they're like... invincible."
Prius Lady : *calls tow truck*
XC90 Driver: *drives off with a mediocre dent and a couple of scratches*
people that suck so bad at driving, that they need to get themselves a volvo so they don't die in crashes
bad driver: "see how i came away unscathed after ramming my car to the walls? cuz i drive a volvo, great car"
police: "dumbass volvo driver"
157👍 364👎
when you own a newer Volvo and it is an automatic.
"It's an automatic, man!"
"No...it's a Volvo-matic, my friend!"
5👍 6👎