SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi

Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.

I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.

Gully Rub

Manual stimulation of the female genitalia, with a vigours rubbing action, in the passageways between houses ‘a Gully’. Usually resulting in discomfort and not pleasure, very prevalent in the Castle Bromwich area of metropolitan Birmigham.

Chog didn’t get his leg over last night, but Sharon really copped it with a Gully Rub

Mcshoulder Rub

When someone gives a shoulder rub right after they have eaten McDonald’s fries, a big mac, and apple pie. This is a service that is not requested by the recipient, and is usually unexpected.

I was just sitting on the couch and all of a sudden I got a Mcshoulder rub!

Rubbing her purse

Female self gratification

I heard moaning and walked in on Jen watching Outlander and Rubbing her purse.

Rubbing day

Lewd:The day where someone can run your crotch or ass and you can't do anything in response unless the response is to rub back
Sfw:the day where your tail or ears can be rubbed and you can't deny it

"Can't wait for rubbing day to see who will try to rub me"

Rub-A-Deuce

When a male defecate on his own hand and proceeds to use that hand to aggressively pleasure himself through masterbation.

Nick proceeded to Rub-A-Deuce after a long night of gaming with his buddies.

rubbing trend

When you read that small dicks are back in fashion and get excited about rubbing a small one in the team shower

Paul was glad he could finally shower with all the other players and was looking forward to Rob rubbing trend