Soggy Speed Bag

The act of licking an enlarged hemroid.

My buddy got totally wasted and gave this fat chick a soggy speed bag.

5👍 8👎

Standard Speed Test

A gay typing test that is a annoying wrong judgement of your typing skills.

Blayney this standard speed test is crap!

4👍 6👎

Speed Boat-ing

1. To procrastinate to the point of avoiding the thing completely
2. To do a job so badly nobody wants it, anyway.

Boss: What is this shit?
Employee: I was Speed Boat-ing...
Boss: You're fired!!!

2👍 2👎

The Speed Of Tom Araya

The act of singing a Slayer song perfectly, the speed, lyrics, and pitch correct. No one mortal being can do this, except for Tom Araya, who is superhuman.

Originally thought up by Johnny Qyxzzy

Slayer Fan 1: Hey dude, can you go at the speed of Tom Araya?

Slayer Fan 2: I wish! No one can, man.

2👍 2👎

high speed dsl's

1) exceeding dsls and dial up at an exceedingly high rate.

2) having dsls and performing filatio at an excedingly high speed

Sharky's high speed dsl's left my shaft soft and flacid

5👍 7👎

fuck to the speed of light

What I keep muttering in my head over and over and can’t stop thinking. this phase doesn’t have any meaning; it’s an incessant noise always going off in my head.

Me: What do I want for breakfast this morning?
My head: Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light! Fuck to the speed of light!

3👍 2👎

midnight speed streaking

when a person goes out at midnight and goes streaking in a fast vehicle of some sort such as a bike, a rollerblades, a scooter, a skateboard or longboard, or a convertible

mark: hey do you want to go midnight speed streaking?
drew:sure, i love to feel a good breeze around my genitals

1👍 1👎