Me and Mike are best hands.
kinda like best friends but a hiccup in sentence structure.
Hands that can't do anything correctly. Infomercial Hands can't strain a pot of pasta or screw in a lightbulb or push buttons on a phone, so they require the purchase of a new fangled item that will come to the rescue.
Scott: What's with that guy? Why can't he tie his shoes?
Peter: He's suffering from Infomercial Hands. He clearly needs ShoeTie™.
Similar to a "Hand Cannon." A "Hand Shannon" is a slapping move made when a boy does not do as he's told.
Man 1: "Why did you leave the Destiny game last night?"
Man 2: "I didn't do the dishes while my girl was gone, got a nice Hand Shannon last night."
hands that have become swollen in the knuckle area due to heavey drinking and smoking, may have acrylic nails, tend to be manly.
"I noticed her bar-hands while she was showing me a diamond ring, must spend a lot time in seedy places."
Left hand is when you ask your bf/gf left or right. If they say left, you owe them a kiss if they say right they get a hug. But you can change up the hands after awhile and make Left hand a hug, flowers and right hand could be a kiss, buying them something.
Jakob- “left or right”
Debb- “Left”
Left hand would be hug now Jakob has to hug Debb
Cumming on your hand, waiting for your hand to dry then working that crusty shit again for ultimate friction.
OR
Swimming for long enough for your hand to become wrinkly, then jerking someone off with your pruney fingers.
def. 1.
DUDE 1: hey dude shake my hand!
DUDE 2: ergh! your hands are crustier than kingsmill! you been granny handing?!