Infomercial Hands

Hands that can't do anything correctly. Infomercial Hands can't strain a pot of pasta or screw in a lightbulb or push buttons on a phone, so they require the purchase of a new fangled item that will come to the rescue.

Scott: What's with that guy? Why can't he tie his shoes?
Peter: He's suffering from Infomercial Hands. He clearly needs ShoeTie™.

Keyboard Theory

When suddenly everybody wants to play with a toy or item (like a keyboard) that has been buried under the bed or tucked away in a closet for years.

Raul: I found this keyboard under the bed. I'm gonna learn how to play the Star Wars theme on it.
Brock: Hey! Gimme that! It's mine!!!
Raul: It's been collecting dust under the bed for 5 years and now suddenly you want to play it? That's Keyboard Theory.

dick nada

Nothing, zero, zilch.

Natasha: "What did you get for Christmas?"
Chloe: "Christmas sucked this year. I got dick nada."

5👍 1👎

F.K.I.A.

Fucking Know It All

Jan has to weigh in on everything. She is such an F.K.I.A.

6👍 3👎