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An alternative to toilet paper which involves sticking your arse out the window on a rainy day and letting the rain clean your behind.
The World Bidet is way more fun than toilet paper
When a classy whore is giving you a blumpkin and, after finishing you off, licks your asshole clean so you don’t have to wipe.
I was winning big a poker and rather than waiting to get cleaned out the casino offered me free drinks and unlimited Vegas bidets for the rest of my stay.
The exact polar opposite of a bidet; instead of being sprayed with a stream of fresh water from your toilet, you spray your toilet with a high-pressure stream of hot diarrhea.
1. I painted my girlfriends toilet with a Reverse Bidet.
2. Never lift the seat after a Reverse Bidet.
“Johnny had a bad case of reverse bidet after eating 5 Taco Bell burritos in 5 minutes”
When one takes a dump that hits the water of the toilet at just the right angle in order for the water the splash back onto the anus, making it inevitably easier to wipe with regular toilet paper.
Friend: "Dude, how do you always shit so fast?" Me:" You know, I just cut down on the wiping time." Friend: "And how do you do that?" Me: I use the old, "Bidet Shit" ploy" Friend: "Ohhhhh... good move man!"
When an automatic toilet's sensor is too sensitive and flushes a toilet while you're still seated, covering your ass in nasty toilet water.
Taking a dump and leaned forward to scratch my leg and I hear, "Whoosh." Damn toilet hit me with the Ohio Bidet.
Using the face, mouth and tongue to clean someone’s ass after taking a dump. Sometimes referred to human toilet paper or htp. It described to be very arousing and once someone has properly experienced this event they dont want it any other. Can be recorded being a common practice with concubines.
She is sooo hot I wish I could be her human bidet.