Rule 34

/ryool-thər'-tee-fohr/ n., pl. Rules 34 - The 34th rule of the Internet, which states that any object, character, or media franchise imaginable has porn associated with it. The only exception to this rule is outlined in Rule 35.

v., p.t. Rule 34'd - To make an object, character, or media franchise comply with Rule 34.

Rule 34 even applies to Magnemite.

In 10 years, the younger fans of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic will discover that their favorite characters have been Rule 34'd.

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Sock rule

When you have 'socks on' your feet any homosexual actions or statements being made holds a status of being undeniably 'not gay'. This rule applies to past, present, and future events that socks are worn at the time of.

When someone challenges if individual is committing an act that is gay, the individual in question must quickly claim whether or not they have 'socks on' or not. This is done to determine the orientation(level of gay) of said event. A third part is allowed to ask if socks where worn if 'socks on' status is not given.

When an action or event is challenged, and if the individual partaking in the event or action only has one sock on, the individual in question has the right to determine the effectiveness of their sock using the chart below.

Having two socks on is undeniably 'not gay'.
Having one sock on or socks that are located beyond the feet regardless of amount are considered ambiguous and is the responsibility of the wearer to determine if it was 'gay', 'partially gay', 'half gay', or 'not gay'.
Having no socks on while performing or saying something homosexual, will always hold the status of gay.

Having one or more socks on your person while also not being worn in any way, holds no value. The status of this/these socks shall not be used for determining an orientation of an event or action.

Person1: "Yo, I'm going suck that dick."
Person2: "That's gay!"
Person1: "Nah, I've got socks on."

Historical Facts:
The quote below is from the original creator of the discord server "The South(WD-40)" and is the earliest documented use of the Sock rule.
"It ain't gay if you're wearing socks" -Sharken 2017 (alias: Sharky)

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Heskey Rule

The age old FIFA/Pro Evo rule that any goal scored by Emile Heskey is equivalent to 6 goals scored by anyone else, except for George Elokobi, who's goals are worth 19.

In the event that both Heskey and Elokobi score in a single match, "blump saturation" occurs and the rule is nullified.

Ben: "What a screamer by Heskey! By means of the Heskey Rule i'm winning 6-1!"

Jordan: "You have forgotten that my goal was scored by Elokobi, therefore the score is 1-1"

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Rule 16

Rule 16 states that there are no females on the internet - specifically in role-playing games and chat rooms.

Expanded Rule 16 states that:
a) All internet men are men
b) All internet women are really men
b) All internet children are policemen

Player 1: Did you check out Rocket Dog' profile? She is so hot, so I PM'd her and she is sexy cool!

Player 2: Dude, remember Rule 16. She's really a 40 yo dude in his living in his mom's basement!

Player 1: No! She's real and she likes me!

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hand rule

When dating if you have sex with a woman more then five times she considers you two to be in a relationship. No matter from the outset it was agreed upon there were no strings attached there are still strings attached whether the male thinks so or not.

Dude, you slept with her how many times? You shoulda stuck to the hand rule!

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Rule of 8

Giving someone up to 8 hours on the dating swipe apps to respond after the initial match or after the last written conversation. If they aren't interested in you enough to contact you within 8 hours, then they won't be after.

Depending on the time of day, the 8 hours is to allow for a workday if they are at work and can't respond back or aren't allowed to have their phones with them. It also allows for sleeping. After 8 hours with no response, they get deleted.

In my dating profile: “Swipe right to meet someone fun and active. Looking to find someone with similar interests. Just want to let you know that I use the 'Rule of 8' with my matches. Hope to hear from you.”

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Aussiball Rules

AussiBall Rules is a derogatory term for the sport commonly known as Aussie Rules or sometimes Australian Rules.

The infantile connotation pokes fun at the absurdity of the sport and the belief that a game once known only as Melbourne Rules has the same impact on world sport as football does.

The term is mostly used by people in Queensland and New South Wales, but also by Victorians who are sick of being called homosexual for liking football or rugby.

Only sixteen professional teams exist in the entire world, ten of which are in one city and share only two home grounds.

Yes, Aussiball Rules is bigger than the Premier League in England and Serie A in Italy and is taking over the world.

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