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When grasping for an object (such as wood or fiber glass) and receiving a hand full of splinters.
Dude, I was grabbing for a pallet at work and I got a Porcupine Hand Job.
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When you sprinkle pepper on your partner's face while having vaginally sex and having them sneeze making there vagina clench tight on your dick like a gorilla's fist.
Guy 1: You dude anal is great, but is there a tighter feeling?
Guy 2: Harambe Hand job by far.
For one day every year falling on the 17th of May a man is entitled to a complimentary Hand job from his respective parter. This is an ancient tradition which must be upheld in order to restore peace and good fortune for the following year.
Good morning my dear. Just to remind you it's the 17th of May and we must complete the harvest of the may Hand job ritual in order to attain good luck and fortune.
When your partner hates having sex of any kind so they choose to jerk the other off in a hurried, rage filled way.
My partner hates sex, but often they will give me an “angry hand job”.
Is when the male is behind the girl. Sticks his whole hand in her vagina. And grabs his own cock while ramming her ass.
That's how you do a belgium handjob
I gave myself a Belgium hand job while I was fucking your mom last night
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A gathering of police officers standing around their sqaud cars socializing. There are usually two or more vehicles and a 'handful' officers.
Ex 1: Hey! Hide the joint, there is a hand job party to the left.
Ex 2: I would not have been arrested if that pig hand't wandered away from her/his hand job party and spotted me.
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When cleaning your cock and balls after giving yourself a Kentucky Blow Job (spitting dip spit on yourself while taking a shit because you missed the toilet), you say screw it and wank one off while using the tobacco juice as lube.
Nasty! I just gave myself a Kentucky Blow Job! Oh well....might as well just finish it off and give myself a Kentucky Hand Job.
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