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The only thing that all men are vain about.
Michael measures his penis every week and posts the results on his website. Of course, he adds five inches when he posts them.
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Referring to multiple penises, typically used in the place of 'dicks'.
Philosopher: "It is little known that the hydra also had three peni, but that's enough about me."
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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢉⢉⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠠⡰⣕⣗⣷⣧⣀⣅⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⣠⣳⣟⣿⣿⣷⣿⡿⣜⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⣳⢷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣝⠖⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⢢⡹⣿⢷⣯⢿⢷⡫⣗⠍⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⢄⠤⣁⠋⠿⣗⣟⡯⡏⢎⠁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠄⢔⢕⣯⣿⣿⡲⡤⡄⡤⠄⡀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠇⠠⡳⣯⣿⣿⣾⢵⣫⢎⢎⠆⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠄⢨⣫⣿⣿⡿⣿⣻⢎⡗⡕⡅⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠄⢜⢾⣾⣿⣿⣟⣗⢯⡪⡳⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠄⢸⢽⣿⣷⣿⣻⡮⡧⡳⡱⡁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡄⢨⣻⣽⣿⣟⣿⣞⣗⡽⡸⡐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡇⢀⢗⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣞⡵⡣⣊⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡀⡣⣗⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡯⡺⣼⠎⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣧⠐⡵⣻⣟⣯⣿⣷⣟⣝⢞⡿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢘⡺⣽⢿⣻⣿⣗⡷⣹⢩⢃⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠪⣯⣟⣿⢯⣿⣻⣜⢎⢆⠜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⢣⣻⣽⣿⣿⣟⣾⡮⡺⡸⠸⣿⣿⣿t use it wrong though or you’ll suffer some pretty terrible consequence
The wiggliest organ in the human body, has purple at the end, is very veiny, is nestled on a VERY hairy ballsack, can squirt sour lemonade out of it's Jap Eye that can only be drunk by very special human beings, or it can squirt yummy goat's milk out, that is very nourishing to babies and little boys who have nothing else to do than drink their own penis made goats milk, and sell it to everyone in nice penis shaped bottles. Some penises are very special, and don't need a man to move around. They are called Donald Trump, Adolf Hitler, and Wee Willy Winkee, and they are despised by all of humanity, even more than micro penises, and BBC's.
"OOOOWWWW!!!!!!! I got my wiggly little penis stuck in the elevator door, and now the whole shaft, not just the mushroom head, is purple!"
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