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some shit you spend £100 on and you talk into it
i got a gaming microphone
When you're face timing someone and the microphone is being viciously blown into, rubbed on, etc.
"Stop microphone molesting, my ears hurt!"
When you put hot sauce in your anus and have a partner out their lips up to your cheeks and then your defalcate in their mouth.
I just gave my brother a messy spanish microphone
When you engage in anal sex with a lover, and go straight to oral sex with another.
Dude, I can't believe she sang into my Missouri microphone last night...
Pilots on long flights in small aircraft would often install in a small funnel attached to a rubber hose that ran out side. If necessary they would use funnel to relieve themselves during the flight
No need to stop at the next gas station said Bill. I'll just use the Polish Microphone
A really fucking bad microphone that sounds like a built in laptop banana.
Horrible Microphone Kid: OMG IM SO GOOD AT THIS GAME GUYS IM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU!
Studio Microphone Guy: Shut the fuck up and stop using your Laptop Microphone
When a person asks you for teh microphone
Joe Mama: Give me teh microphone
Joe Dada: no
Joe Mama: GIVE ME TEH MICROPHONE