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White, middle-class, middle-aged female. Hair pulled through the back of the baseball cap, into a ponytail. Usually seen "driving" a very large SUV. Also seen at stop signs staring aimlessly with their mouth open waiting for an open spot in traffic. Usually doesn't find one, so they pull out in traffic hoping to make their own spot. Thus causing an accident, which is paid for by their husbands income. Seen as an active parent at school. However, they never talk to their children because they have a cell phone blocking their ear, that they constantly scream into. Participating in booster clubs, PTA, church organizations. Ironically, you can find them cursing at the cashier because he couldn't return their curtains that they bought over a year ago, but never found time in their oh-so-busy lives to put up. All of this is usually done in front of their 'christian' children, who are going to grow even more mindless than their role model of a mother. Occasionally they go in flocks to the nearest mall, and trash every department they step into, throwing shoes on the ground, leaving once-hung items lying on the floor. Sometimes you see them running for the nearest open register, and fighting with the women that casualy strolls in front of her, explaining that she was there first, and doesn't have time to waste. She has to drive her one or two children away in an SUV that comfortably seats 8, so they don't miss their sports practice, or dance recital. Inflating gas prices mean nothing to these women and their gas hungry SUVs, because they haven't paid for anything with their own money since they married the father, who gets drunk twice a day, and comes home late into the evening. Lastly, these soccer mom's only answer to "homemaker"
A soccer mom is the lady you've seen on the side of the road yelling into her cell phone, standing next to an SUV with a flat tire. Don't offer help, she'll never appreciate it.
72👍 15👎
Some sort of detriment to life. A waste of body cells. Middle-class or lower-upperclass, SUV driving, bitch. Cuts people off on the roads, cause accidents only able to be paid for by her husband's income. High up on the school PTA, try to censor anything and everything. Fucked over all of American society.
They are also great targets for a variety of weapons.
Jay was drving his brand new Corvette Z06 when a fugly soccer mom crashed into it with her fucking large minivan. Needless to say, Jay upheld the rebellious spirit by blowing her head of with an M82 .50 cal. He then ate her children and blew up her house.
2136👍 634👎
Middle aged, middle class white woman, usually from the suburbs of lare metropolitan areas. Her life revolves around her 'prescious' children, and she will do anything to keep them safe. This leads her to support things to keep those sweet 'gifts from God' safe, including: gun control laws, new stop signs, new traffic lights, speed bumps in residential neighborhoods, booster seats, and enviornmental laws.
Soccer moms usually own large, fuel ineffecient vehicles. This is the consequence of her having to transport her kids with all their sports equipment, books from sporting event to sporting event. Another consequence of this is a strong support for protracted guerilla wars in the Middle East that soccer moms (wrongly) believe will keep the price of gas down.
They voted for Clinton/Gore in 1996 cause Clinton was cute and made them think Dole would gut education/health care. In 2004 Bush has them scared shitless that terrorists would target their 'babies'.
A typical day for a soccer mom involves making lunch for her little tykes after which she 'runs errands'. These errands usually involve the purchase of large amounts of drugs from black men in the city. The drug causes soccer moms to drive erraticaly during rush hour (ie cutting people off, failing to merge properly, failing to signal while changing lanes, hugging two lanes, failing to maintain safe speeds). Drugs also cause the average soccer mom to adopt dellusional perceptions of her children. This causes her to yell at the other team during soccer matches whenever her child fails to score.
287👍 80👎
female mothers, sometimes single, that haul their little tykes around to soccer practice or games; vehicles they drive range from big ass gas hogging SUV's to mini vans with a soccer sticker placed near the back window; usually upper middle class cake eating assholes
The soccer mom gave me the "evil eye" after I clearly stated loudly, soccer should have stayed in Europe.
269👍 75👎
A soccer mom is typically a 40 year old, Caucasian, middle-class suburban woman. She is often seen driving an SUV everywhere, taking her kids back and forth from the many activities they participate in after school. They typically have a family of a husband and three kids, and own a two-story house with a picket fence in the front yard. They are overprotective parents who blame rap/rock/metal music, the Internet and video games for all of today's problems in the world. They drill their Christian bullshit into their three kids since child birth, and look down on anybody who doesn't have the same beliefs and opinions as they do. They censor out a lot of stuff yet little do they know, their kids are going to find all of it out in a couple of years anyway. The children of the typical soccer mom are forced to participate in loads of sports/activities after school, even though they may not like them. They aren't allowed to play any other video games other than a Nintendo Wii for only an hour a day. They have no Internet access, other than Brainpop.com and other educational sites. They must go to church every Sunday. If they disobey all of these requirements, they are grounded for a week and sent to their rooms. The soccer mom demographic is mainly the ones responsible for all of the unnecessary censors that are out in the media today. Soccer moms make me sick.
"That soccer mom over there just yelled at me because I was playing Metallica on my iPod at full blast!"
"Wow man, what a bitch."
21👍 3👎
an out of touch woman who drives her kids to soccer games and plays and usually bitches about everything under the sun. she can be seen bitching at managements of compenies and usually "thinks" a kid is better than everyone and anything else including a dog
she also has this "idea" that she is still in her teens/early 20s when in reality she is far from that and tries to be "cool" by subscripting to magazines meant for teens which makes her pathetic
"oh man that's one pathetic soccer mom she should stop bitching and get a life"
72👍 17👎
An arrogant rude peice of shit. She drives around a gargantuan, gas guzzling, jap crap suv. She has no life, and gets angry because hubby is at work all day. Speaking of hubby, he's probably masturbating at Hooters while his stupid bimbo wife maxes out the credit card. It's a miracle anyone would even want to fuck a soccer mom, because they are fat and ugly.
My mom is not a soccer mom. She let's me play GTA: Vice City Stories on my psp while she drives a pickup truck at the speed limit. Then I take a break from my game to flip off the soccer mom passing us at 70 mph. She gets in an accident trying to cover her kids eyes.
75👍 18👎