Are you raping me?

= Are you kidding me
Thank you Lucas Cellar

"You are suspended for 2 weeks, im sorry"

"WHAT!!! ARE YOU RAPING ME!!!?????"

or

"He doesnt even talk to me"
"Are you raping me!?"
"...ummm...no...."

23👍 63👎

You turn me

A phrase used by gay people when they want to compliment a woman on her looks, they may say "You turn me"- the woman looks so beautiful that she turns them from gay to straight.

*Amanda walks into the room*
Straight guy: You look beautiful tonight
Gay guy: Amanda you turn me

10👍 19👎

you send me

See soviet russia.

In Soviet Russia, car drives you!

10👍 29👎

You heard me.

Roughly translates to, "I'm a pussy who won't repeat what I just said because I know if I do I'll get punched in the face."

John: Faggot
Bandon: What?
John: You heard me.

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you remind me of the babe

From the sexy beast David Bowie song "Dance Magic, Dance." In the AMAZING movie "Labyrinth." If you haven't seen it I definitely recommend. 1 hr and 40 mins of Bowie Bulge? Okay! Also RIP David Bowie :(

You remind me of the babe.

What babe?
Babe with the power.

What power?
Power of voodoo

Who do?
You do!

Do what?
Remind me of the babe!

Today you, tomorrow me

From the spanish "hoy por tí, mañana por yo", it is used to "justify"acts of kindness toward strangers.

Thanks for helping me with my flat tire. Please accept this $50 as a token of my gratitude.
No need. Today you, tomorrow me

103👍 6👎

do you get me

A query you ask someone after stating a joke that they don't get

Louis: "hey sophie did you hear that half life 3 comes out february 29th, 2019"
Sohpie: "oh wow that's awesome"
Louis: "sophie do you get me 2019 doesn't have a february 29th"