Random
Source Code

Anti-Masturbation Cross

An anti-masturbation cross is a device used by wankerphobic Christians. It combines the cross with straps to keep people from the age of 5+ from masturbating. It should be ended to help end wankerphobia.

John's parents are going to buy an anti-masturbation cross. I'm praying for him. I think Seb may have tipped them off.

by A_Manwithhiv April 22, 2021


deranged masturbation

psychopathic masturbation that leads to admission to a mental facility.

“i found her taking part in deranged masturbation”

by eyd1804 March 11, 2024


ASHIPIN masturbation

ASHIPIN masturbation is a technique that involves stretching both legs to bring you closer to orgasm.

He used to do ASHIPIN masturbation a pot.

by Hoevarun June 17, 2022


Cellular Masturbation

A person who plays on their cellphone while on the toilet

I think there is cellular masturbation going on in the stall over because he is laughing for no reason whatsoever.

by jondich February 2, 2021


masturbation escape plan

This is the plan you make when you have limited time to jerk it. Especially applicable when someone living with you may return at any moment, or could walk in on you. Its having the cursor over the x , having something to cover your junk quickly, having another tab to click to etc. How to cover up the fact you were j-ing off quickly if someone were to come in.

Bro my girl was supposed to be gone all day and she came back early and caught me beating my meat. I fucked up not having a masturbation escape plan.

by Mcgwicko August 31, 2022


masturbation professor

The very essence of UBC Computer Science professors. Unfortunately this disorder passes onto its top students as well.

You need to pay each of the masturbation professors a total whopping sum of 1 million dollars per course per term as they masturbate on both the male and female instagram profiles of their students and talk incoherently in lectures just to pass time and disorient their prey.

by MatrixEnergeticWar September 10, 2023


Religious Masturbation

Religious Masturbation.

Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.

A religious leader preaching to the saved

Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.

The preacher gave a nice example of religious masturbation; a preaching about conversion to the saved

by Lyreluthier October 15, 2019