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Fig Newton

A mediocre guy either in looks, personality, or both. And although he is average in every way, he thinks he is basically Ryan Reynolds.
While they may stay fig newtons forever it is possible for them to transform into something…like an Oreo…..or even a chocolate chip cookie.
While they are rare, fig newtons can also be female.

Examples: Jeff and Lester from the TV show Chuck
Dwight from the office.

Frollo from Hunchback of Norte Dame
Farquad from Shrek
Prince Charming from Shrek 2
Hans from Frozen
J’son (Starlord’s ‘Dad’) from Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice (honorable mention Mr. Wickham)

Yeah, we talked a bit. But, he was a bit of a fig Newton so I’m not interested.

Oh, nah! He a fig newton.

He got that fig newton haircut.

He talks like a fig newton.

He was the figgiest of newtons.

by notafignewton March 27, 2022


moldy fig

(n.) A term used (mainly by beboppers) to describe someone whose musical tastes are old or out of date.

"Did you hear what John was playing at his party last night? Man, that guy is such a moldy fig."

by DJ MoldyFig September 14, 2017


fig boar

The most elite 4 man defensive line in high school football.

When fig boar was put into the game, the fans knew a sack was coming.

by Fig boar November 6, 2020


Fig Flicker

someone who flicks a males testicles

Michael is a Fig Flicker

by metallicballz February 12, 2010

6👍 1👎


fig roll

A fine biscuit to have with a nice cup of tea, with the added bonus that they contain all the figgy goodness you need for a healthy lower gut. Due to the biscuity exterior it is never used for figging.

"Say Jimmy, what's that your noshing on?"
"A fig roll, they're divine"

by Curious Gregor July 24, 2006

14👍 5👎


ginger fig

A red headed faggot

Joey is such a ginger fig

by #TOSK February 20, 2017

21👍 9👎


Figs Out

When a mans wang is sticking out of the pee hole in his boxers.

Larry woke up and answered the door in his boxers, little did he know he was Figs Out.

by Crack O Da Ass December 8, 2004

15👍 6👎