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if i beat it i aint wearing a johnny

Its a term forin people use

person 1: Are you gonna have sex with that girl?
person 2: yea
person 1: Are you wearing a condom
person 2: If i beat it i aint wearing a johnny

by Muffin90210 February 16, 2022

28๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


What do we have for 'em, Johnny?

A sarcastic comment that is used when someone figures out something really obvious. An imitation of a game show host announcing that someone has given the correct answer and has won a prize that his assistant (Johnny) will specify on cue. Often preceded by "Ding ding!"

Boss: "OK everyone, Brenda Smith is going to be out on Thursday so we need someone to volunteer to fill her time slot."
Mike Hawk: "I'm available that day. I can do it."
Boss: "All righty then. I'm going to go ahead and stick Mike Hawk in her slot."
Steve: "That's what she said! Or...um...actually I mean that's what HE said!"
(everyone laughs except Jim)
Jim: "I don't get it..."
(20 seconds go by)
Jim: "Oh haha, now I get it...Mike Hawk sounds like 'my cock!' It's sexual innuendo. That's a good one."
Steve: "DING DING! What do we have for 'em, Johnny?"

by Nicholas D February 20, 2009

44๐Ÿ‘ 7๐Ÿ‘Ž


Tell him to go eat shit Johnny

The act of telling a lost Nun to consume excrement and mistakingly decend from there mount.

Gyro: Tell him to go eat shit Johnny

Johnny: Tell him yourself

Gyro: Eat shit asshole! Fall off your horse!

by Bojo183926 August 19, 2021

12๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Johnny Depp Someone So Hard

When you accuse an innocent party, such as when Amber Hear accused Johnny Depp in an effort to cancel them, when in fact they are (just like Johnny) the innocent party. This can be used to scapegoat someone, shift blame, or just cause chaos. This is referred to as to โ€œJohnny Deppโ€ someone. As an extra form of gaslighting, you can pretend this means the opposite, hire a PR company to help portray the opposite, and remove or hide items off of the internet.

Question: โ€œYouโ€™re going to blame an innocent student for Lukeโ€™s hysteria?โ€

Answer: โ€œIโ€™m gonna Johnny Depp someone so hard theyโ€™re gonna want to crawl into a hole and die.โ€

Or

โ€œI did not punch you, I was hitting youโ€, as you watch the innocent party then escape to bathroom, pursue, and smash a door in their face.

by DefinitelyNotElon October 8, 2023

6๐Ÿ‘ 12๐Ÿ‘Ž


fuck me in the ass and call me johnny

something you say when you are very surprised by what just happened or you dont know what to say. It is also something you could say to make a bunch of people laugh in

Guy 1: *silence*

Guy 2: fuck me in the ass and call me johnny

Guy 1: *HAHA* bro what the fuck was that *Cough Cough* you have me dying over here

Guy 2: *Laughing* i dont fucking know dude no one was talking so i just said something

Guy 1: ok then

by SmallCreamDaddy November 27, 2021


Smack my ass and call me Johnny!

1. An expression of surprise, similar to "Well I'll be!"

2.What you say when you want somebody to smack your ass and call you Johnny.

1. "I just won the lottery!"
"Really?"
"Yes!"
"Well smack my ass and call me Johnny!"

2. "Smack my ass and call me Johnny"
Ok Johnny. Smacks ass.

by Reepacheep March 13, 2011

35๐Ÿ‘ 29๐Ÿ‘Ž


Johnny Apple Seeding All Over The Place

When playing Golf, this refers to when someone continously takes large divots and uses alot of turf seed in the divots.

I was hitting the ball so fat man, I was Johnny Apple Seeding All Over The Place

by Glen S. May 11, 2006

5๐Ÿ‘ 13๐Ÿ‘Ž