fruit tax

To pay for something with a sent picture of a 🍉 or 🍑

I’m going to need a fruit tax

Stupidity Tax

The cost to fix an error that was easily avoidable, often costs such as parking of postage incurred when forgetting to make a purchase at a more convenient time or with sufficient foresight.

Example 1: I forgot to put the beer on the shop, so I'm gonna have to order it by itself and pay the stupidity tax.
Example 2: I forgot to get her present last week so now I'm gonna have to pay the stupidity tax to get it next day delivered.

Odin's travel tax

Clothes or jewelry you lose on a road trip.

"I can't find my earring. I guess it's Odin's travel tax now."

The Morgan Tax

When you are managing a restaurant team in a new market and have an employee who knows they are wildly more qualified for your job but chose to not to accept the offer bc they make more money serving. Morgan will absolutely dive in and save the day 9.6/10. Until, however, she gets rocked off her mind on Sunday eve knowing damn well shes assigned to a party of 60 the next day and then calls out with 12 min notice

When the shift starts at 11am and it’s 10:34 am the morgan tax is defined by the following exchange
Texting the Morgan: Hey girl thanks for reprepping Garde, running those 9 tables who werent yours, absorbing Emily and Olivias sections last night when they started crying and also thank you for staying a little later to help the expo close! Whats your ETA though because those party guests are trickling in.

Morgan: no

Carbon Tax Chrystia

a nickname given to former fianance and deputy PM Chrystia Freeland by the conservatives because she thought and bragged it was a good deal to tax Canadians to death

Carbon Tax Chrystia is just like Justin & Carbon Tax Carney !

Immigrant tax

When someone moves to a different country and, as an immigrant, their previous work experience is not recognised and they earn less.

I moved here 2 years ago and I’m still paying immigrant tax. I should be done in a couple years

Bitch Tax

The fee you are morally entitled to charge your female friend when on any occasion or outing, they start to bitch and complain.

'We went on a girls weekend away and it only took 5 minutes for Sandy to start bitching so we had to increase the Bitch Tax.'

1👍 5👎