A Tony is a rare sight and reclusive in nature, choosing to order dominos and binge death note instead of going out and being social. Tony's are dreadful at committing to plans due to the fact they're allergic to responding to messages until 2 weeks have passed. This godless creature isn't aggressive to most, but does have a tendency to get in screaming matches with the one known as Ezekiel.
Everybody knows a Tony.
Everybody also knows a Tony’s Pizza, Italian deli, fish market, produce stand, barber, or tire shop (aka Tony’s Tires).
DEFINITION 1 (noun) — Tony the person tends to show up most as a pretty likable dude in your life, but can also be a super hot chick you follow on instagram, a favorite gym teacher, OR the drug dealer who’s never been late.
DEFINITION 2 (noun) — Tony the place tends to show up just when you need it most.
For example, you’re on a road trip and stuck in a really small town and really fucking hangry. You fire up your Yelp to see what’s around, and lo and behold, up pops a Tony’s Pizza. It has 5 Stars and the most reviews in town (always does!). You head over and suddenly find yourself eating the best slice of your life.
DEFINITION 3 (noun, adj.) — Tony the “thing” tends to show up only after you’ve accepted Tony as the Holy Grail.
Once you recognize Tony for what it actually is, you start seeing him (or her) everywhere. You see people. You see pizza parlors and barber shops. You see Tony the Tiger. You see and hear “TONY” encoded in other words, like rigatoni, stony, and the name Tonya. You might even start using Tony in casual conversation.
As an adjective, you might want to start using Tony to describe how good something is (highly recommended).
DEFINITION 4 (verb) — This is for pure Tony-enthusiasts only. Derived from Tony the “drug dealer’s” impeccable punctuality, Tony the verb means it’s very fucking FAST and RELIABLE.
Tony (n.) — “You cruising up to Tony’s later?”, “Is there a Tony’s around here?”, “I love me some good Tony”.
Tony (adj.) — “Last night was Tony, bro.”, “I was SO ton’ied at that show last night!”
Tony (v.) — “That shit got here Tony as fuck.”, “You don’t need to drive so Tony right now.”
Basically his name is toenail. We call him tony the balooney sometimes.
“Hey Tony, did you do your homework today” - Teacher
toilet paper. Tony is a noun and a thing but not a person’s name in the context of toilet paper. As something more personal though, we piss and shit all over tony. We cry our tears into tony and tony can make our lives hell by leaving us the quarter sheet for the clean up of a three coil spoiler. In essence tony can be trusted unless tony’s pillowy softness is breached. Sometimes tony hurts our buts. But for that pain tony is both a blessing and curse.
I’m worried about fights caused by the lack of tony on the grocery store shelves.
A seemingly normal person who becomes skibidi when nearing a school or playground.
Girl 1: "Johnny always rizzin, and he got drip!"
Girl 2: "at my sisters birthday he was being a tony"