You Should Have Killed Me When You Had The Chance

A song by A Day To Remember written about when you're playing Call Of Duty. An enemy is five feet behind you, and in attempt to kill you, they waste time fumbling to throw a grenade instead of shooting you. In the time it takes them to do that, you turn around kill them effortlessly.

Brett: Dumb ass computer. He was standing behind me and in the time it would have taken to shoot me, instead he pulled out a grenade.

Josh: What a retard.

Brett: Totally. I killed him while he was still taking it out. He could have just shot me on the spot and killed me! You Should Have Killed Me When You Had The Chance, CPU.

Josh: Yeah.

4👍 16👎

Gregory, do you see that small vent on the floor? Have you heard Among Us, Gregory? You need to vent. I know it will be hard for you to be sus but I know you can do it Gregory.

AMONG US

Freddy: Gregory, do you see that small vent on the floor? Have you heard Among Us, Gregory? You need to vent. I know it will be hard for you to be sus but I know you can do it Gregory.

17👍 4👎

If you don't eat yer meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?

A phrase heard in the Pink Floyd song, "Another Brick in the Wall". Extremely funny.

Son: "Mom, can I have some pudding?"
Mom: "You haven't eaten your meat yet."
Son: "But mom!"
Mom: "Son, you know that: 'If you don't eat yer meat, you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?"
Son: "Don't be quoting Pink Floyd on me again..."

384👍 87👎

Have😏you✨seen👀the🐱state😚of🦋her👩body💃 If🚤 I🧘 ♀️ beat🤜 it👩 💼 I👁 ain't🙅 ♀️ wearing👕 🅰️ Jonny👦 Adeola📍when💋 I👁 roll🤘 with👼 🅰️ geezer🛑 Is💠 it🟢 me👆 or😺 the💊 lifestyle🌌 sweetheart⛽️ Actually👹 I👁 don't🙅 ♀️ give🤲 🅰️ shit🤬

Kinda like the I MISS THE RAGE ⁉️ thing but with a different thing

Have😏you✨seen👀the🐱state😚of🦋her👩body💃 If🚤 I🧘 ♀️ beat🤜 it👩 💼 I👁 ain't🙅 ♀️ wearing👕 🅰️ Jonny👦 Adeola📍when💋 I👁 roll🤘 with👼 🅰️ geezer🛑 Is💠 it🟢 me👆 or😺 the💊 lifestyle🌌 sweetheart⛽️ Actually👹 I👁 don't🙅 ♀️ give🤲 🅰️ shit🤬

22👍 56👎

Have you ever had a dream that, that, um, that you had, uh, that you had to, you could, you do, you wit, you wa, you could do so, you do you could, you want, you wanted him to do you so much you could do anything?

THE ULTAMENT STUDDER

Have you ever had a dream that, that, um, that you had, uh, that you had to, you could, you do, you wit, you wa, you could do so, you do you could, you want, you wanted him to do you so much you could do anything? no ok

How long have you been standing there

When you do something you usually only do alone, like sing while washing the dishes or making food for example, and someone was standing at a distance in the same room and you notice, so you ask them how long they've been there.

guy 1: *singing*
guy 2: hi
guy 1: how long have you been standing there?

Have you heard the joke?

a person who is trying to tell a stupid joke
(it happend to me of course )-:{ )

a: Have you heard the joke?
b:which joke/ no
a:(saying a joke)