measure

Measure your weight or height
Ex: Big ass, Big booty, huge penis,...

Let's measure this penis!
Measure your own dick you pervert!

cosmetic measures

A term used to describe short term solutions for long term problems to gain popularity or people's attention.

Millions of rupees spent as cosmetic measures in schools rather than fixing the curriculum and hiring qualified teachers.

measuring rod

Einstein was known for his thought experiments with measuring rods when explaining relativity.

1 - A tool used to physically measure lengths and survey areas of various sizes.
2 - Einstein's dick.

"The rigid measuring rod is thus shorter when in motion than when at rest, and the more quickly it is moving, the shorter is the rod."

"And how big is your new TV Herr Einstein?
About 4 and half measuring rods."

Having a Chalky measure

A measure of any alcoholic spirit served in the West Midlands that is generally done by eye but is significantly more than a pub measure and could increase as the night goes on

Hi, go sit down on the settee while I fetch you a drink and you can tell me about your day, I'm having a Chalky measure if you want to join me