You are ironic. Why are you ironic ? Because you are
An exceedingly firm clench, hold, or grasp around the shaft of the victim's penis, that is so forceful that it is deemed 'iron'. It is painful, and commonly used for, a bargaining piece, a way of releasing anger, an action of aggression, or to see the look on their face.
"I got George in such a good Iron Cock Clench that he almost pooped himself."
Expression used to say a conflict or discussion is solved
They would iron the folds if they understood eachother
Two nights ago, Rory's Roger iron rusted (Rory's TV busted) - from Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998)