woke up with wood

Woke up with an erection, as in the ZZ Top song "Woke Up With Wood."

I had a great dream last night. Woke up with wood too!

22👍 3👎

morning wood chip

When a female wakes up with an erect, hard, throbbing clitoris, often after having an erotic dream; female equivalent of a male having morning wood.

I had such a hot dream last that I woke up with a morning wood chip.

17👍 2👎

Elle Woods Test

Would you stake your life on the reliability of your results? A test of collected data such that the person who collected the data believes so strongly in the validity of the data that they would stake their life on the accuracy of the data.

"I'm sure this rope is strong enough."
"Does your data pass the Elle woods test?"

Varnishing Your Wood

sexual inuendo

varnishing being lube
wood being your penis

preparation for masturbation or sex

Girlfriend: hey are you ready love, or do you need help varnishing your wood
Boyfriend: im already on it dear

Hot Wood Jamboree

When shit blasts out of your anus at an incredibly horrifying rate.

Eve: “Where the hell were you, Adam?”
Adam: “I had a Hot Wood Jamboree. Toilet’s gone

put the wood to

Have sex with

He put the wood to her.

2👍 10👎

wood-hood

A place where cows and fields are plentiful, the most un-hood place on this planet

You been cow tippin in the wood-hood before?

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