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The act of a male stripping naked, geting into a squating position, and a woman crab-walking underneath him, allowing his man-berries to sweep across her face.
Me: Yo, I totally New Zealand Carwash-ed that girl last night!
You: Sick bro! Was that enjoyable for either of you?
Me: No, no it was not.
61👍 10👎
An alter-ego for Middle Earth, so that that all of those guys can fit in with us and no one will realize they are still using swords and running around with magic staffs.
Son: when I grow up, can I live in Middle earth, Daddy?
Father: Of course, it's called New Zealand, and it's right near Australia.
14👍 118👎
Receiving an early morning hand job (approximately 6AM) while watching a nature channel
Nobody believed Chris when he said his wife regularly gives the New Zealand Sunrise
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The term to describe the massive native population decline in New Zealand. 25 percent of New Zealand college graduates have fled New Zealand, and nearly 20 percent of adult working age New Zealanders do not live in New Zealand. 1000 New Zealanders a week move to Australia to make significantly more money and life better lives in cities that are not crime ridden, tall poppy syndrome ridden, road to nowhere hellholes that exist in New Zealand. 1% of the New Zealand population leaves its country each year.
Did you see that new guy at work? He's a New Zealander.
Yes, he's the fifth New Zealander I've seen today. They are all coming over here because there's nothing in New Zealand but sheep and crime ridden cities. It's like a New Zealand Holocaust over there.
106👍 28👎
An extremely over-priced city where you must be patient, be prepared to pay shite-loads of rent , be prepared to get stuck in traffic. Full of immigrants, commonly; Fijian, Indian, Chinese, Pacific Islander are the main ethnic groups here. Employers here would rather hire foreign skilled workers who struggle with english for cheaper labour rates rather than pay a few dollars more per hour for local tradesman etc... with great english skills. Auckland is pretty much a smaller version of Sydney, Australia. Has some pretty spots and good to visit, will stress you the hell out living and working here.
Person from elsewhere in New Zealand "Hey mate, I lost my job, you think I should move up to Auckland ?"
Aucklander " Yeah sure, if you're willing to live off canned spaghetti and instant noodles in order to make the weekly rent bill"
Auckland, New Zealand
14👍 1👎
The act of having your SO laying upside down and taking a dump on their “downstairs” in a swirl (ice cream like) formation. And then allowing it to slid down their front to their face and leaving a snail trail.
I was doing Matilda dingo style. I pulled out and gave her a New Zealand Mudsnail and it waltzed all the way down to her mouth.
Having anal sex in geographical regions that partain to both hot and snowy weather in the same season.
Geography teacher:"Stacy got a New Zealand Canteen on vacation in Europe, now tell me class what places could she have been to?"
46👍 14👎