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Something substitute teachers don't have.
Kid: "can I go to the bathroom?"
Teacher: "I don't know, CAN YOU?"
Kid: "I don't know? CAN YOU GET A FULL TIME JOB"
18👍 6👎
When a white guy plugs a black girls butt hole then pulls it out and finishes in her eyes temporarily blinding her.
Dan gave Yolanda a full solar eclipse.
A body’s reaction to something so amazing that you shiver all over.
A group of friends or an event that consists of almost all girls.
The opposite of a Sausage Fest.
What was the ratio at the party like last night, was it a sausage fest, or more like a full ham sandwich?
1👍 2👎
When you're doing anal and she leaves a thin coating of shit on your dick
Man 1: "how did last night go?"
Man 2: "pretty bad. We did anal and she gave me the full brown jacket"
Man 1: "oh shit, I'm so sorry"
When you have sex while listening to The Planets Suite Op. 32 by Gustav Holst, you start waving your dick around like a conductor's baton for Mars the Bringer of War, then you rigorously eat your girl out to Venus Bringer of Peace, followed by rhythmic fistibg during Mercury the Winged Messenger and a long deep throating for the "I vow to thee my country" interlude in Jupiter, Bringer of Jolity. Then you both get up and go to the bathroom during Saturn, the bringer of old age. The action resumes during Uranus, the Magician as the girl puts on a strap on and GOES TO TOWN. Finally, by the time you hear Neptune the Mystic, you both have leg cramps and then you both jump out of bed and that's pretty much it because you both have work in the morning.
The missus and I were going full Holst last night during the Proms.
When you sleep outside for the night and wake up to wet morning wood. Were you raped? Only by nature.
Carl: Hey Brad! My wiener is wet, did you rape me last night?
Brad: Bruh you just have a cock full of dew! You passed out in the grass after the party.