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The most depraved sex act imaginable. It involves moose antlers, a jug of maple syrup and the Stanley Cup.
My girlfriend and I totally did Canada's History last night. She's still pulling bits of moose antler out of her vagina and my farts still smell mapley.
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As defined by Stephen Colbert of the Colbert Report, Canada's History is the name of one of the most depraving sexual acts known to mankind. It requires moose antlers, maple syrup, and a Stanley Cup.
"Me and Kelly had sex last night"
"Did you do her doggy style, or what?"
"Canada's History"
"Ah sick, dude!"
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A lewd sex act in which a female in a heterosexual couple sprawls out her body on a set of moose antlers and inserts the various points into orifices on her bodice. The male then unscrews the cap to a maple syrup jug with his sphincter and dips his erect penis into the now exposed syrup. The male then defecates into the top of the Stanley Cup and mixes it with the rest of the unused syrup, and then pours it onto the female. He then inserts his penis into the female's mouth and begins to rub it on her molars and wisdom teeth (granted they were not pulled) until he is on the verge of ejaculation. The man then pulls out and the woman closes her mouth so the man can ejaculate on and below her lower lip so the semen looks like buck teeth and
therefore makes the female look like a beaver. Shortly afterwards, Dany Heatley runs over both in his car.
So I hear Ronald got really drunk last night and Canada's Historyed his girlfriend.
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One of the most depraved sex acts of all time. 5 men all have explosive diarrhea on a single woman, then use it as a lubricant to fit all available appendages into the woman's womb.
"I'm going to my girlfriend's house with 4 other guys. We're gonna give her a Canada's History."
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A Colbert Report fan with nothing better to do.
I'm such a Canada's History I put off finishing my econ assignment to enter this definition.
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A Twister-like, but sexually natured game in which a person attempts to insert moose antlers - lubricated with maple syrup - into several parts of ones partner's body while filling the Stanley Cup with the various resulting fluids. The more insertions a person forces upon his or her lover, the more "Avrils" (points) are accrued. The evening's winner must chug the resulting swill; otherwise that person will be deemed "hoser of all the land."
Gentleman 1: "Dude, brah. I'd give three dicks to teach that c-bomb about Canada's history."
Gentleman 2: "Toronto or Montreal rules?"
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Also known as "The Beaver" was originally any sex act which incorporated the remains of a land mammal and an organic based lubricant, however it has more recently been more specifically defined by conservative enthusiast as the act of filling the Stanley Cup with maple syrup and human excrement then dipping moose antlers, dead or living though dead is more common, into the said mixture then inserting them into the anus of sexual partners while mutually performing oral sex. While generally considered "safe" it is not recommended to those under the age of 65 years old due to its unusually high mortallity rate and less common but confirmed cases of spontaneous growth of extra sex organs especially in hermaphodites.
I visited my grandmother at the nursing home the other day, she told me all about Canada's History.
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