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Christian

A deluded person who believes they deserve to suffer eternal torment save for a sadomasochistic and non sensical sacrifice by a mythical figure. This mytical figure (Jesus of Nazareth) is largely plagiarised from other cultures. His believers believe his book foretells his comming, but when actually read in context (eg Isaiah 7:14, Micah 5:2) it has nothing at all to do with him. They worship him as a risen zombie and ocassionally indulge in ritual cannabalism - some christian sub cults actually believe they are eating human flesh.

They often lie and misrepresent scientific FACTS and many hear voices in their head. Many deny solid evidence and believe that a woman was made out of a rib and decieved by a talking snake. This caused "sin" although no evidence of moral laws exist out with humanity. The book they revere tells us that their god punished them and all mankind because of this act - even though they could not have known what they were doing was wrong. Much of the rest of the book is about killing babies (eg see the book of Joshua) and sending everyone to eternal torment

Noteable Christian examples include Fred Phelps, Jimmy Swaggart, Ted Haggard, Benito Mussolini, Pope Stephen VI, Tomas de Torquemada, Kent Hovind, Paul Jennings Hill, Robert Mugabwe, thr Yorkshire Ripper and antisemitist Martin Luther to name but a few of their finest

by Kend0 June 7, 2010

206๐Ÿ‘ 186๐Ÿ‘Ž


Christian

Someone who beleives in the divinity of Jesus Christ and enjoys trying to force this beleif on others. If you belong to any other religion, they attempt to convert you with intimidation and insults.

Christian: Hey, want to come to church?

Athiest, Muslim, Jew, Hindu, Buddhist, Taoist, etc.: No, I'm sorry, I'm not christian

Christian: HEATHEN! DEVIL-SPAWN! DEMON! HERETIC! YOU WILL BURN IN THE FIRES OF HELL FOR ALL ETERNITY! YOU MUST CONVERT! ATONE FOR YOUR SINS OF IGNORANCE! IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW THE TEACHINGS OF OUR LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST YOU WILL NOT HAVE ETERNAL SALVATION AND YOU ARE EVVVILLLLLLL!!!!!!

Non-Christian: .................. uhhhh.......*too stunned, frightened, and offended by the raving lunatic in front of them to speak*

by cdsortapes October 14, 2007

293๐Ÿ‘ 272๐Ÿ‘Ž


Christian

A Christian is a person who believes that praying to the two thousand year old corpse of a man supposedly named 'Jesus' will solve all of the world problems.

They are mostly white conservative republicans, usually with a low education, that wish to force everyone into their cult of what can only be described as necrophilia.

The common Christian is an extremely brainwashed and mentally unstable pile of flesh and bone, they lack common logic, and cannot form a coherent thought, they should be approached with extreme caution, communication should be avoided at all costs, and physical interaction of any kind may be fatal.

random normal person: Hi Jeff. :D
Christian: REPENT!!!!
random normal person: *calls 911*

by Shader95 November 3, 2010

177๐Ÿ‘ 160๐Ÿ‘Ž


Christians

a group of brain-washed people who worship jesus christ, and spread their propaganda of beliefs through media of all sorts, including television (jesus channels), radio;music (jesus rock, gospel, ect.), books (the bible), ect, and say that if you don't agree with their beliefs, you will go to hell.

"Hey Bill."
"Yeah Jim?"
"Lets watch that awesome gameshow, Praise the Lord, on the Jesus Channel."
"Excellent idea...those crazy Christians..."

by bob89 June 18, 2005

484๐Ÿ‘ 464๐Ÿ‘Ž


Christians

Stupid goody-two-shoe fuckheads who love to suck up to the government. They think that everything in life is useless and the only thing worth giving attention to is there invisible deity called "god", whom of which they have yet to prove the existance of. They also foolishly believe that the United States was founded as a christian nation, when in fact it was founded upon Agnosticism, yet the Christians stole it from the Agnostics.

I hate christians, They are the worst kind of religious people. They are fucking obnoxious assholes. A christian that lives next door to me snitched me out to the police for smoking the green a couple years back. Hey, guess what. I can do whatever the fuck I WANT, you fucking fascists. I don't care if this is your nation. I am me. So don't you tell ME how to live. I hate you stupid fucking christians. Just fuck off the Earth already and drop dead. Assholes...

by not found [Error 404] May 19, 2007

717๐Ÿ‘ 701๐Ÿ‘Ž


Christian

A believer in an imaginary, mythological and demonstrably foolish and insane religion which has brought more hatred, death, torture, pain, sadness and fear to the world than anything else except Islam.

Hey, look at that Christian over there, torturing someone.

My goodness, weren't most of the Nazis also Christians? I heard the commandant of Auschwitz was a 'good' Christian who attended church every Sunday.

Listen to that Christian televangelist asking the poor little old ladies who watch his show to send them their money so he can continue his lavish lifestyle and have sex with prostitutes.

by Jesus Izza Myth October 13, 2009

197๐Ÿ‘ 182๐Ÿ‘Ž


Christians

A massive ammount of ignorant people who follow a belif passed down from their parents for multiple generations. The common christian belif is that there is a man in the sky who controls everything on Earth. They take everything written in a 2000 year old story book as fact and live their lives by it.

Most christians are too stupid to know why they are christians in the first place.

by DeCeP7ioN May 18, 2005

336๐Ÿ‘ 317๐Ÿ‘Ž