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A very mysterious form of martial arts where the weapon of choice is time.
Lu Tze, grand master of Deja-Fu, has already kicked your butt. Don't you remember challenging him?
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The art of yelping. In particular, using words designed to cut or slash at the business owner's sense of self-worth.
Your yelp-fu was so good that I heard the business closed-down, yo!
Or,
Don't make me bust-out some Yelp-Fu on that place...
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Fruit Fu is a martial art that uses fruit and other produce as weapons
Fruit Fu Master: Haha, I attack you by smashing a watermelon on your head
and squirting lemons into your eyes
Victim: arghhhh, that stings!
Fruit Fu master: submit or else i will break out my celery nunchucks.
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An over zealous act of cunnilingus which leaves the victim's privates feeling as if she's just gone 5 rounds with jackie chan.
Sammy: Ugghhh I surrender
Nick (downunder): I knew you were no match for my tongue fu!
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In laymens term, Kung fu = Skill
Kung = Energy
Fu = time
anything that takes energy and time developes its own level of kung fu.
Chinese based martial arts are often refered to as kung fu. When regarding these systems of martial arts, many people, especially todays modern martial arts crowed, mis understand the truth behind chinese based martial arts.
There are many schools of kung fu that do not have actual masters teachning them, this is where the common mis conception of its effectiveness comes into play. those ignorant of the truth behind chinese martial arts view these schools and form an incorrect ideal of what kung fu is.
traditional chinese martial arts, often are very quick, very powerful, and extremely effective in thier efficiency.
to become proficient in chinese martial arts however, takes great time.
due to the methods and the variance in technique, chinese martial arts, often, take three times longer to become proficeient in. however, when you reach a state of proficiency, you will have a higher degree of available techniques. Rather than the simple basics that many (mostly modern martial arts such as MMA) have. A "kung fu" master, delves in depth to the intricacies of the human body and its mechanics, exploiting any and all weaknesses in thier opponent, being able to explode from any position, and from any posture with heavily practiced techniques for such occasions.
only the ignorant believe any system of martial arts superior to another.
it is simply in the practitioner itself.
for those seeking very in depth studies that will only grow and flourish with time, traditional chinese martial arts are for you.
for those seeking basics and a quick step guide to basic average fighting skills, do not study traditional chinese martial arts. you will not understand, you will be left behind, and you likely will not have the will, determination, and patients required for such a highly refined skill set.
they say on technique a thousand times is better than a thousand techniques one time.
in kung fu, we practice the thousand techniques, a thousand times.
thus the extra time involved in learning to become truly profitient.
in the beginning your kung fu will be weak, near the end, your kung fu will be unrivaled.
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The art of being a bum ninja, or a ass assassin.
Being a Bung Fu master is a sure sign of gayness
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n.
1. The knowledge, expertise, and skill one acquires after years of Chinatown bus experiences and adventures, usually referring to Fung Wah.
2. The ancient Chinese martial art of escaping fires.
"Get there 10 minutes early, travel light, don't sit near the bathroom, bring your own food, hope for a 4-hour trip but plan for 6 or more... whoa -- I KNOW FUNG FU."
"One time my bus was leaking oil, so we were stranded in Connecticut for 8 HOURS!"
"Oh yeah? MY bus flipped over twice and then burst into flames -- and I survived."
"Wow, you are a true fung fu master."
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