International day of having a Portuguese best friend

June 20th is the international day of having a Portuguese best friend. If you have a Portuguese best friend, make sure to celebrate by throwing sardines or pork at them.

"Tomorrow is international day of having a Portuguese best friend!!! I can't wait to throw sardines at João!

have a black belt under the Nogueira brothers

"Have a black belt under the Nogueira brothers" is a phrase used when something is being handed to somebody for free or when you recieve something you haven't earned. For example a toy in Happy Meal.

Yes, I bought this car. I won a lottery yesterday so I got myself a black belt under the Nogueira brothers. (have a black belt under the Nogueira brothers)

I just have really high standards

Originally used by Good Charlotte's crushes during their teen years.

"You're not good enough for me!"

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I just have really high standards

An excuse given for breaking up/not accepting a date

It's not you. It's just that I have really high standards.

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"Do you have a license for that lawn mower?"

A phrase used by a homo sexual or gay man to ask another man if they are gay and would like to get it on with them.

The other man will either respond with, "Yes i have a liscene for my lawn mower, indicating that yes, they are gay and want to get it on, or no, that they do not have a licsense for their lawn mower, indicating that they are straight.

"Do you have a license for that lawn mower?"

No!

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and I have a time machine in my backyard!

Meaning that you're practically saying it's bullshit.

Person 1: Oh, I got all A's for my report card!
Person 2: Yeah sure you did, 'and I have a time machine in my backyard!'

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You have so much to live for!

when you wanna sound like an angel and a super-nice person to get praise when in reality you don't care about the depressed person at all

depressed person: "i just wanna die"

attention-seeker: "but you have so much to live for!"

depressed person: "aw thank you"

everyone else: "attention-seeker's so kind and right, you don't deserve to die!"

attention-seeker: "alrighty now that i've gotten my fair share of attention, it's time to move on to the next suicidal person!"

-I do understand that there are people that truly mean it, however, so thank you to those who do-

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