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Located on the outskirt of London is questionably the best town in the whole of the uk. Home to a legend (S.J.Chapple). The town attracts tourist from all continents and is frequently visited by screaming girls demanding autographs, photographs and dates. Full of chavs.
Let's go to Ashford to visit S.J.Chapple
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To be "Solid" or "Solid As A Rock" (a song made famous by Husband & Wife duo Ashford & Simpson)...
When a girl gives you the hardest, most veiny and throbbing boner ever. Can sometimes feel like the penis is literally going to crack and shatter. Can only be sustained by more of the same action (which may result in ejaculation) or immediately after, using a cock ring.
Girl: Ooh baby, do you like the way I'm rubbing your cock between my big-ass titties all covered in hot oil, stroking your balls and playing with a dildo in my ass so you can fuck me all while we're watching lesbian porn?
Guy: Are you kidding baby? I'm totally Ashford & Simpson right now.
A very freaky character from Resident Evil Code: Veronica who dresses up as a girl and has a very high pitched voice.
"You're just a rat caught in my trap, Claire Redfeild! *insert weird girlish-like laugh*"
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A woman that normally teaches English, who looks like she just got done injecting heroin and snorting 7 lines of cocaine.
Mrs Ashford smells like a poopy vagina.
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Burning down an orphanage, fucking the ashes, and doing the fortnite default dance on the ashes
I’m gonna dirty do a Dirty Ashford on that orphanage over there.
A guy whose family wouldn't let him get a sex change so they sent him far away from normal people. He's from Resident Evil: Code Veronica. He dresses up as his sister and even sounds like a girl. He tucks his dick in his dead sister's underwear.
Claire Redfield: Oh noes! Look at that freak.
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Toni Ashford has been worshiped in Burcania for hundreds of years. The Goddess of war, fire, preditory animals, and a patron of hunters. Rituals worshiping this goddess often involve the sacrifice of sheep. moldy sheep. but only if they don't belong to your neighbor.
"Ahh! the war is going well. Praise be to Toni"
"damn fire won't start!" "did you sacrifice a sheep to Toni?" "Err..no. i'll go do that now."
"May Toni guide the easgle's spirit"
"Toni sent a jaguar to the village last night. Took two sheep."
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