coast guard

Those who police the police.

Lisa: If you're the police, who will police the police?

Homer: I dunno. Coast Guard.

498👍 176👎

Coast Guard

The hardest working and most important of the United States' 5 armed services, performing search & rescue, drug and illegal immigrant interdiction, as well as port security.

Dude, the US Coast Guard is the coolest fucking service ever!!

407👍 186👎

coast guard

A rather unique branch of the DOD that used to be part of the Department of Transportation. Generally involved in missions including:
Drug Stopping/Seizure
Envoironmental Protection
Search and Rescue
Homeland Defense
I consider this to be a pretty valuable asset of the US military, but often wonder why it hasn't been incorporated into our Navy.

Fisherman 1: "Oh crap, out boat is sinking!!!"
Fisherman 2: "Sweet! Here comes the Coast Guard to save our asses!"

164👍 132👎

Coast Guard

Someone who finds herself saving friends from unfortunate sexual situations.
see sailing your boat

"Coast Guard Kortney saved me last night, she pulled me off of that guy with the Fo-Hawk and jacked up teeth, Oh My Gawd!"
"Man, Coast Guard Kortney saved me, but then she made out with him"

25👍 130👎

Coast Guard

A bunch of military wannabes.

how they hell are they even part of the military!?

109👍 711👎

Coast Guard Academy

1) According to most Americans, it does not exist. Sort of like Area 51.
2) Founded in 1876, it actually resides in New London, Connecticut (which means most Americans might as well be right). The Academy is a four-year military-college-ish environment that ostensibly educates and trains young Coast Guard officers.
2) Academy graduates are lovingly referred to by OCS graduates as "Academy Pukes."

1)
USCGA Cadet: I go to the Coast Guard Academy
American Citizen: What's the Coast Guard Academy? Are you in the Navy/Air Force?
2)
USCGA Cadet: The mission of the United States Coast Guard Academy is to graduate young men and women with sound bodies, stout hearts, and alert minds...
3)
OCSGRAD1: Hey, man did you get your billet on the Diligence?
OCSGRAD2: NO! Some Academy Puke got it first.

130👍 39👎

Coast Guard Academy

A four year military academy in Connecticut. Exists but only to some. Consitently ranked as the worst dorms and most unhappy students in the the nation. Class of 2010 doesn't care and is hoorah about life here.

Class of 2007: I hate being at the Coast Guard Academy.
Class of 2010: I love this place, shining shoes and brass on Friday Nights Rocks!

78👍 47👎