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Girl: I’m pregnant!
Guy: O Rly?!
Girl: Ya Rly!
Guy: FALCON PUNCH!!!!!!!
Girl: OMG Noooooo
Guy: K thx bye (runs)
185👍 135👎
A finishing sexual position. Bed doggystyle. When the male is in the process of ejaculation, he shouts, "FALCON PUNCH" and thrusts with all his might, consequently knocking his partner off of the bed and decreasing her stock by one.
"We were making love all night long in my room and it was so magical that I had to end it with a Falcon Punch. It was beautiful."
27👍 15👎
To focus a legendary amount of EPIC and WIN into one's fist, then delivering the force while screaming "FALCON PAWNCH!!!" It can destroy everything, including your mom, who's fat... It can only be delivered by those who have balls of steel
Man 1: Yo, so John was being an asshole, so I Falcon Punched him...
Man 2: So where is he now?
Man 1: I dunno
72👍 51👎
What happens when you divide by zero.
Teacher: So Tommy how do you finished this problem?
Tommy: I subtract 10, then divide by zer-
Teacher: Oh no u dint
FALCONNN... PUNNNCH
*Tommy gets a Falcon Punch to the face...
22👍 14👎
Verb. To use an extremely epic move or tactic in anything that grants the user instant victory.
Example One:
Teacher: The atomic bomb ended the war when it was dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. In a sense, we basically Falcon Punch'd the Japanese so that we don't have to drag the war out any longer.
Example Two:
Michael: So I was playing poker with John the other night, and I had a three of a kind of fives on the last hand.
James: Did you win?
Michael: No. He pulled a goddamn straight flush out of his ass and won the game.
James. Damn man! He Falcon Punch'd you!
Officially created in a south east england grammar school, falcon punch was originally a punch to a pregnant womans stomach, but the offspring of this phrase has succeeded, to the more ethical, less dangerous and practically more enjoyable FALCOOOOOOON PUNCCHH! Taking a Captain-Falcon like stance, swing the fist back and uppercut the targets rectum, a strait shot can have devestating effects; any of the following:
a) Instant case of touching cloth.
b) Instantly released fart
c) Slow build up to needing a massive crap.
d) Target instantly shits themselves.
As the venom of the falcon punch increases, the symptoms worsen. Often resulting in incapacitation. Requires FALCON PUNCHHHH to be shouted loudly whilst being carried out, or the same result is not achieved.
I need to go to the toilet, sam just falcon punched me.
Person1: FALCOOOOON PUNCH!
Person2: WHAT THE FUCK *shits themselves*
Ahh that reeks! did someone just get falcon punched or something?
57👍 45👎
The act of clenching your fist in after dousing it in alcohol and lighting it on fire, afterward you wind up and yell "FALCON PUNCH" as the fist is inserted into the woman's vagina at punching speed.
Chad: How'd your date with Alice go yesterday?
Thad: Well she wanted to try something new last night so I tried to Falcon Punch her, now she won't stop glaring at me.
4👍 1👎