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Cancerous growth on super steroids prone to lying and bullying truth tellers.
That rapist pulled a Lance Armstrong on the stand when he mentioned the victim's skirt.
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A man who can do more with one testicle than most could do with a pair.
Lance Armstrong rides his bike fast. With one testicle.
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A great but overrated cyclist. Seven Time winner of the Tour De France. Often called the greatest cyclist ever by passive American cycling fans that have never heard of Eddy Merckx, Bernard Hinault, Fausto Coppi or Miguel Indurain. Merckx and many others went on to race in hundreds of races while Armstrong focused on the Tour. His only other races were often training for the Tour at Tour de Georgia or Dauphiné Libéré. Merckx raced every race to win. Lance often was just training for the tour and along with his contemporaries would not take the risk seen in the Coppi-Merckx Era.
LA Fan: Lance Armstrong is the greatest cyclist ever!
Reality: No way dude. Eddy Merckx or Coppi.
LA fan. Who? you're crazy!
Facts: Merckx! Cycling was around before 1999. Merckx won 525 races and won the Giro D' Italia and Tour de France five times. Lance only talked about racing the Giro. Never even showed and has never ridden in most of the Classics like Paris-Roubaix which Merckx won three times. Also never attempted the Hour Record as he hinted on for years. A record for which Merckx is the standard.
LA fan: But Lance won the Tour De Georgia.
Reality: Dumbass!
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When a girl gives a guy head when she has plutonium in her mouth.
Man, I wish I didn't have to go in for this ball surgery tomorrow. Damn hooker tricked me and gave me a Lance Armstrong!
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George Bush's new biking partner
Instead of talking to Cindy Sheehan last week, Geroge went out on the bike trail for 2 hours with Lance Armstrong.
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a term used for the purchace of a half sack of weed.
Tommy:"hey man im all out, can i get a lance armstrong?"
Shawn: "yea dude. Stop smoking all your shit so quick!"
Tommy: "Some one should of told that to Michael Phelps!"
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