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For those sassy seniors who have had it with those disturbingly obvious adult diapers.....say hello to Absorbent Thong! Our patented shoestring suction technology consumes every ounce of urine or poop it encounters!
I haven't felt like I was this young and sexy since i was young thanks to absorbent thong...did i leave the oven on?
Dude...check out that sweet ass!
Dude...shes like 70!!
I'd do her!!
Me too!!
Here's to Absorbant Thong!!
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The act of positioning multiple layers of toilet paper on the water surface in the toilet, creating a cushion in order to prevent the water splashing or 'plopping' when a turd hits the surface, thus avoiding a loud noise being produced. The layers of tissue act as a cushion, absorbing sound energy of the turd . The art of Plop Absorbing is particularly useful when the toilet user wishes to remain anonymous to people outside of the bathroom.
Example 1:
Arnold: "FUCK YOU NICKI! I told you I needed the toilet first!"
Nicki: "Chill your beans fag-bag, I only need a pee ."
Arnold: "You better be only needing a fucking pee!"
*Nicki commences the Plop Absorbing process*
Example 2:
>Chucky is on the toilet, while Arnold is getting ready to go to a party listening to the radio.
>*Arnold turns radio off*
>*Chucky performs the Plop Absorber as the radio will no longer camouflage the noise*
Example 3:
barack ripped the tissue segments with anger and threw them into the toilet. However, his anger had caused him to miss the water and as a result the tissues were stuck on the side of the toilet bowl. Barack had unsuccessfully executed the Plop Absorber.
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A person whose instagram and other social media photo galleries are filled with selfies - even including the full body mirror reflection ones. The annoying self absorbed people who chronicalize every mundane detail of their lives by posting selfies.
See exhibit A: Kim Kardashian's instagram/twitter
#selfie-absorbed
Simply stated, it is an individual that is so consumed with their own selves that they become oblivious to, nor do they care how their actions or words impact others.
Sarah was so self-absorbed that she shouted at her daughter for no apparent reason.
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A person who cannot stop thinking about themselves, and constantly reminds all others around them of their good and bad qualities. See Sam.
(Jane) "If you looked in the dictionary, your picture would be filed under 'self-absorbed.'"
(Sam) Gasp "My picture is in the dictionary?!"
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A soul-patch-like piece of facial hair on men which lays just below the lip on the chin and is be used to absorb the shock of the balls hitting the face when said man is sucking a cock.
Justin Bieber will soon enough have a beautiful shock absorber.
The first thing I look for in a man is a shock absorber... tells me they know what they are doing.
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absorbed in your own interests or thoughts etc.
absorbed in your own interests or thoughts etc.
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