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a jigger of well bourbon, split on the counter, wiped up with a rag, wrung out over a handful of ice from the salad bowl
I asked the bartender from a basic instruction and he threw me out of the bar
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A short publication that would have saved you a lot of time if you bothered to read it. However, reading an instruction manual before attempting to assemble/use the product with which it came is a sure sign of mental and physical weakness.
Manuals come free with purchases of self-assembly furniture, electronic products, children’s toys and many, many other products.
Some of these products are so simple to use, (eg. A padlock) that a 55 page, multi-lingual, fully referenced brochure doesn’t really seem necessary
When writing an instruction manual, follow these simple rules and you can’t fail;
1. Make the pages from stiff, shiny paper so that it’ll only stay open at the right page with the help of a rock, a toolbox and a dining room table positioned on each corner.
2. Make an extensive ‘Contents Page’ using the smallest font available and ensuring that you number the chapters, sections and sub-sections. Do this even if you only have 3 pages.
3. If applicable, include an illustration of the parts the buyer SHOULD have received and make sure this includes a picture of the manual itself.
4. When you reach the English chapter, don’t be tempted to waste money on a translator, as you can simply guess most English words and make up the rest as you go along.
5. Be sure to include diagrammatical information where appropriate – get a four year old child to help you with the drawings.
6. Make the manual's cover attractive to women so that they can sit on their comfy sofas and shout directions at their husband/boyfriend when they are doing perfectly well with superior male intuition (and brute force)
The instruction manual was written in total gibberish.
The instruction manual's glossary section was extremely useful.
Jack: Would you like to learn how your phone works in Arabic?
Jill: Oh Yes Please!
Jack: Here you are, it starts on page 205.
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A riduculous document which is far too detailed and tricky to write, permanantly needs updating and then once ratified it disspears into a black hole never to be used by anyone.
Work Instruction for application processing
Where you have sex upon given instructions from someone that is not your normal sexual partner.
Charlotte gave me some in-depth instructions on how I should have sex with my husband last night. It was the best instructional sex I’ve had.
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This 2 words started on the internet in Blogs or something similar that were very, very stupid like: "How to jump" or "How to read" on Steam. So It was so stupid that people start writing these type of commentaries: "Unclear Intructions, ..." It most used for Guides that his steps are very very easy.
How to read: You did it!
Guy: Unclear Instructions, eat the toster
Guy2: Unclear Intructions, get cock stuck in a tree
Guy3: Unclear Intructions, eat hard drive
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1. A video game guide booklet that comes packaged with the CD-i game "Hotel Mario".
2. A vary powerful item in the world of YouTube Poop, it has various abilities, and has enough power to even destroy God Luigi, the final form of Gay Luigi. It is believed to be controlled by Mario.
1. If you need instructions on howta get through duh hotels, check out The Enclosed Instruction Book.
2. Mah Boi, The Enclosed Instruction Book is what ALL true warriors STRIVE for!
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Instruments for teaching mathematics can also include calculator, pen, rubber etc...
Some of those who carry WMIs, are suspected of being part of Al-Gebra -network.
The key members of Al-Gebra -network are claimed to have acquired vast amounts of Weapons of Math Instruction.
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