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When a family member ruins Christmas by fighting with everyone
My uncle is a real Old Saint Dick continues to argue with people about politics and religion every damn Christmas.
While taking a girl from behind, grab some of her hair in each hand and shout "Now! Dasher, now! Dancer, now! Prancer and Vixen,
"On! Comet, on! Cupid, on! Donder and Blitzen"
For a present I gave my girlfriend the old saint dick. Best Christmas ever.
465👍 169👎
The theorem that someone has watched so much porn in their early teens that once they have matured, masturbation and simple pornography does not arouse them.
“Bro Moyers you asked that girl for nudes?”
“Sorry man, x-vids just ain’t cutting it”
“Man you weren’t lying, you do gotta old man dick”
the most clever thing that can be carved into a bar of old spice soap.
look i carved a y on the end of spice and i carved dicks at the end how funny is that
20👍 11👎
Being worthless and having nothing to live for.
That guy is as worthless as an old broke dick dog.
55👍 10👎
Mr. Dick is a jolly fellow who loves to whip out his dong around the Christmas Season.
"Oh no, is that jolly Old st. Dick?"
"Better run inside before he brings out his you know what!"
5👍 1👎
A dude who bails on his friends to go out with women; his dick is so crispy that if it doesn't get wet every night then it will become too brittle and break off.
Rami just texted to say he can't hang tonight. Old crispy dick is at it again!
2👍 1👎