Cat

U must be pretty stupid if you don’t know what a cat is

You just now: what is a cat?
Me: Who does not know what a cat is?

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Cat

A small, usually furry creature. It chooses when it will send or receive affection. They will either love you or completely despise you, there is no inbetween. Will most likely control the human race in 50 years.

Person #1: What is that!

Person #2: Just my cat.

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Cats

1. Rulers of the internet

2. Cute

3. Fireballs of claws and death

Me: Hey its a cat
Friend: oh cool
Me: *makes a luring noise*
Friend: you shouldnt-
Me: *strokes cat*
Cat: *purrs* meow
Me: oh whos so cute? *looks away* *accidentally pokes cats eye* ...
Cat: *catches fire and goes into ball form with claws facing out*
Me: uhm.. *gets attacked by cat* *dies* *singed body on the ground*
Friend: i told him so...

END

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Cats

Cats are medium sized, fluffy felines. Cats love to play and cuddle, but don't be fooled by their cuteness; they have razor sharp claws that can slash out your eyes. But they're still very cute.

Cats are cute and fluffy, but vicious.

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Cats

A furry animal that hides in the tiniest of spaces just to jump out at you and scare the hell out of you.

Martha jumped when Tard the Grumpy Cat flew out of the laundry basket. Martha hated those kinds of cats.

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cat

demon that you love anyway

cat: *evilly* meow
me: so sorry sir, let me feed you

cat: *purrs*

me: i love you too

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Cats

Depending on who you ask, they are the epitome of evil, the cutest thing alive, satan's babies, ninjas, ninja-satan-babies, those animals they don't give two cruds about, living rugs, fur with claws, claws with fur, teeth with fur and claws, teeth with claws, teeth with fur, fur with teeth, what you shouldn't step on, a catto, the stupidest things alive, the future world rulers, the things trying to kill you in your sleep, the things trying to protect you from the things trying to kill you in your sleep, aliens, carnivourous monsters, little angels, everyone's best friend, the bane of all existance, the thing that sits on you at three in the morning, or just a cat.

I am sure I have missed at least 500 other definitions of cats. Publish your own description to fill in what I missed!

First person: There were feral cats in my backyard the other day.

Second person: Satan's fur babies!?!?!?? Where!?!?!?? * pulls out crucifix *

First person: Woah, calm down. Cats aren't satan's fur babies, they're ninjas. When you look for them, they're gone......
Second person: * muttering ancient chant to ward off evil *

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