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A middle aged woman with a child the woman has to have everything perfect and goes crazy if someone comes at her child
They're are the reason for car crashes , global warming , teenyboppers , frat boys/girls , they mostly stay at home waiting to pick up their "angels" for what dumbass activity their brats are doing , or annoying the crap out some sane person , or causing car wrecks in the air-polluting SUVs , they hate anything that is non Christian (despite being spawns of Satan) , internet , freedom , minorities , anything that will "corrupt" their "precious little angels" , they keep their children away from anything that will make them individual. They also hate gamers and anime fans
Me : *Listening to Melanie Martinez*
Soccer Mom: HEY ! YOUNG LADY QUIT LISTENING TO THAT SATANIC GARAGE YOUR LISTENING TO , YOU ARE CORRUPTING MY BABY
Soccer Mom's kid : *smoking weed behind his mother's back*
Me : You're not my mom
Soccer Mom: THEN I'M GONNA TELL HER
Me : Fine
Soccer Bitch tell my mom
Soccer Mom : Hey your child is listening to this Melanie Martinez
My Mom : So what ?
Soccer Mom: WTF ! YOU SHOULD PUNISH HER FOR LISTENING TO THE DEVIL'S MUSIC
My Mom : *walks away from crazy Soccer Mom *
My Mom: Don't worry *insert name* , hopefully she and her brat will die in a car wreck
And this why soccer moms are pure evil
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A cocktail comprising of approximately one bottle of wine and two Xanax.
Kevin's Mom was a nervous wreck until she fixed herself the soccer mom.
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The person that gets stuck picking everyone up to take them to work or an event.
The Designated Driver in a group of drunken friends
Take a taxi, I'm not your Soccer Mom
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A white, suburban woman whose only purpose in life is to drive her whiny ass kids places, be a housewife, and go get her hair and nails done with her friends. She is Christian, and hates anything that might corrupt her "beautiful innocent babies".
Me: turns on "Black and Yellow" on phone
Soccer mom sitting 2 benches down with her toddler: EXCUSE ME what is that trash you are listening to? You better turn it off right this instant!!!
Me: Bitch you ain't my mother now shut up or move if you don't like my music, I was here first anyway
Soccer mom: I will tell your PARENTS about you corrupting my sweet innocent little baby! Now see what they say about that!
Me: *turns up music and flips her the bird*
Soccer Mom: *runs away crying*
A Fundemental Christan Women who claims all who are not Christan is evil her husband is a veteran and she has bumper stickers saying "My Kid is a Honour role student" or "I'm a Soccer mom I can't handle it all" or "Land of the free because of the brave" They stay at home talk to other Soccer moms and are connected at the hip she was slutty in collage that's how she passed doing all the professors male and female. She Got Shit Faced 24/7 found her husband on a bar got married has 7 lil'angles who are total dicks. Named Brandon,Edmound, Harry, Kennedy for the girl, and Kaytlin and Howard who the boys will grow up and be criminals and the girls will repeat the cyle. The Father is a veteran from the Persian Gulf war he came back from Iraq boasting about Desert Storm victory makes SIX Figures at a job such as manager or lawyer or became a cop and makes jack shit. The Mom is afraid that her kids will embarrass her and she wants to make more friends so she drags the kids to soccer games and other sports to smoke a joint and gossip. The father is at the firm or VFW and cheating with the secretary at both. The Kids than Finnish a soccer game and go to karate and they think they can kill somebody because they are in Karate. Than it's 11:30 pm the kids come home do Home Work from Honours Algabera. Than have Bedtime. And the cyle resets than they bring a friend over the kid brings a IPod and the mom finds out and kicks the kid out.
Hey Dan's stupid soccer mom wont let him play GTA iv because it makes reference to the Yugoslav wars and Crime and Drugs
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A stay-at-home middle-class over-parenting mother that suffers from Dunning-Kruger effect in a particular way that affects her outlook on many issues of life. She tends to over-nurture her children, but only in a way that aligns with her strong although often unfounded beliefs and not necessarily reason. A soccer mom professes such beliefs obnoxiously, forcefully and tactlessly to others, often angering the public while feeling vindicated due to her own morally superhuman understanding of the situation.
These moms typically hold such assertions: her child is unquestionably (although not objectively) superior to all other human beings; career women are incompetent in raising children; all laws, precedents and religious dogmas are morally right; her family is entitled to preferential treatments; a Fiat Multipla has non-demonic features, as well as similar outrageous delusions.
Over the years, the soccer mom definition has grown to absorb in itself the groups of mothers who could have previously only been described as Kyoiku Mamas (asian parent, very demanding) and Stage Moms (soccer moms, but more dramatic). Overall, the soccer mom phenomenon is a part of a larger Helicopter Parent one.
There is a modicum of chance that I may be wrong on at least one of the views I have - said or thought no soccer mom ever.
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