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Watch his "Behind the Music": Ted adopted an underage girl named Pele Massa to have sex with her.
Ted wrote the song "Jailbait" where he talks about having sex with thirteen year old girls.
In his VH1 Behind the Music, he admits to having sex with several underage girls, saying their parents allowed it, and guessed they figured better him than some drugged out high school dirtbag. One of his accusers was 12 years old.
Ted Nugent is 100% a pedophile, listen to his song, Jailbait. He says,
He Ted Nugented that 12 year old girl, now he's on the sex offender list. Read the Lyrics to Ted Nugent's song, Jailbait. Ted sings, "I don't care if you're just thirteen," "I just know that you're probably clean," "Jailbait you look so good to me," "I know I've got to have you..." "Put those handcuffs on her, I'll share her with you!"
Ted Nugent's song, "Jailbait" is about raping a 13 year old.
He's being a Total Ted Nugent, dating that 15 year old.
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A sexual act which requires the application of hand sanitizer to a penis while masturbating. Just before climax, a third party must ignite the hand sanitizer, which causes the entire package to burst into flames. See flaming susanne for vagina.
Hey Earl, would you mind helping me with a flaming ted?
To pull through a parking spot and park facing toward the aisle.
I’m going to Ted Park so I don’t have to drive in reverse when I leave the lot.
When you're desperately needed because of an unfolding catastrophe, but you skip out to go somewhere less stressful.
Them: We have a project due tomorrow, the boss shouting at me, and the clients have been calling nonstop for the last two hours! Where the hell is John!?
Me: Oh, he decided it sucks here, so he went on a Ted Cruise.
1186👍 456👎
Chicago Ted is the greatest man to ever live. Long ago, in the Himalayas, the abominable snow man mated with a dragon. Their offspring then mated with Mount Everest, resulting in quite an odd creature, but oh... was it powerful. This creature then mated with a woman in the year 1970. After three years of pregnancy, the woman gave birth to a boy with a name unpronounceable by the human tongue in Chicago. As soon as it first opened it's eyes, the United States had a stock market crash. (See 1973 Stock Market Crash.) He weighed 28 pounds. It was pure muscle.
When the zombie outbreak occurred, he battled the zombies by hand from Chicago to Pennsylvania, where he ascended a steel mill and created a steel coffin.., for himself. He then buried himself 68 feet underground, while inside the coffin, out of sheer will. He awaits there to this day, for when the dead walk the Earth again, so will Chicago Ted.
"The Witch cries because she knows Chicago Ted is coming."
"I saw Chicago Ted piss out a forest fire, and then kill the survivors... kind of a jerk if you ask... OH SHI--- *bones breaking.*"
"Chicago Ted came into my store, and took everything he wanted. He then murdered my first born son. Later on, it turned out that these exact actions saved the planet. I don't know how, but I trust him."
"Chicago Ted looked exactly like I pictured him, Tall, Dark, Masculine, and Naked. He had a bottle of expensive whiskey in one hand, a cigar in another, and he was having sex with my cousin, while interrogating a suspected terrorist."
"I watched him crawl out of the plane wreckage and he grabbed me by my arm and pulled me out of the wreckage, gave me a bottle of Everclear, and a pipe bomb and said, 'It's every man for himself, kid.' He then shot the bottle, igniting both me and the pipe bomb. I survive today because he says I can."
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Someone who isn’t hot no matter how many people on Twitter and tumblr say so.
He also killed, raped between 30-50 women in the span of 2 years. He burned body parts in his wife’s kitchen, had sex with dead bodies, bit, stalked and abused so many women and confessed to it all before he was electrocuted in 1989. If you think that man is a snacc get out cuz your disgusting
Man your not looking so fine today. Not as bad as ted Bundy tho he was a serial killer who was a disgusting human being!!!
50👍 14👎
A pathological liar who cannot bear to admit the truth.
dude, yesterday, James told me he slept with his girl. He's such a lyin' ted.
20👍 4👎