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Sofa Dick

The condition in which the neurovascular and muscle tissues of the male sexual organ become atrophied resulting in decreased penile length and girth. Traditionally seen in middle aged overweight males after getting married.

That Priest definitely had sofa dick when he decided to leave the monastery.

by Biden’sSBPayUp$$$ October 29, 2021


sofa jumping

Doing the horizontal shuffle at a house party whilst everyone else is asleep.

Me and Sandra were sofa jumping when you guys passed out last night.

by Gorby2.0 October 28, 2021


sofa injunction

When your wife insists you sleep on the couch after she finds out the details of your super injunction and stops believing that you and that cheap whore are "just friends".

Jon: I hear Ryan Giggs got served a sofa injunction.
Emma: Ouch. That's got to hurt.
Jon: Not really, he's pretty into shemming.

by dontknockit May 25, 2011


sofa kink

a kink that you want to have sex with sofas.

Woah emeli, your sofa kink has gotten worse

by drbarnes8274 November 19, 2021


Captain Sofa

A position of authority where you have full control of a sofa and who sits on it. Nobody is allowed to sit on the sofa unless they say, "Permission to board, sir?"

"Captain Sofa" originated from a Pickles comic:

Opal: *Sits on the sofa*

Earl: *Clears throat*

Opal: Forget it. I don't care if you ARE Captain Sofa. I'm not saying "Permission to board, sir?" every time I sit down here.

by Someone who kinda exists March 9, 2022


sofa roaches

A group of Teenagers occupying a lounge room. Esp. if there is an insufficient number of seats .

I can't watch the football because the TV room is full of sofa roaches.

by Roozy666 April 27, 2019


shaking my sofa

A way of getting revenge or harassing someone

Nick: You didn't share your croissant with me, and had my sandwich without permission? Just you wait; one day, you'll come home and your sofa will be shaking!
OR
X:Physics and Chemistry were pretty easy in the test, but Maths was definitely shaking my sofa.

by ShakeMySofa February 10, 2023