Penis Receptacle

n: a vagina, anus or mouth

Timmy slid his dick into her warm wet penis receptacle. After a few medium paced strokes Timmy switched to the tighter penis receptacle and then proceeded to nut all over her last penis receptacle.

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penis-spanked

The female equivalent to pussy-whipped.

Michelle, why do you keep doing his laundy? You're so penis-spanked!

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Cool Penis

A compliment given to any clown in pursuit of impressing a crowd.

Derek just drew a party foul by creeping on some girl and telling some stupid story. Pat observes and rightly exclaims "Cool penis, bro!"

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italian penis

An Italian Penis is a very big and thick penis. It is rumoured that Italian men and men of Italian descent have got very big penises.

Ben: Hey man! What have you got underneath your trousers? A whiskey bottle?
Giuliano: No man, it's just my Italian Penis!

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Athlete’s Penis

Term used to describe the condition of a persons manhood after it has been subjected to a long night of sexual intercourse (usually without a condom), or over-enthusiastic masturbation. Normally red, throbbing and sore to the touch.

Oli: Did you have a good time with that slut last night then?
Mark: Yeah but my dick is so sore today.
Oli: Chlamydia?
Mark: Nah mate probs just a severe case of athlete’s penis.

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Penis Ache

When you have an erection for so long it begins to hurt.
The only known cure for this is sex, masturbation will postpone the effects but not stop it all together.
Most commonally affects young teenagers with glasses, inhalers and a chess award.

Dude 1: Dude can I fuck your sister, I'm getting serios penis ache here
Dude 2: Bugger off I'm curing mine first

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penis pump

A pump powered by batteries to lengthen or pleasure the owner of a penis.

I used a penis pump when my penis was 3", now my penis is 5".

NOTE: NOT ALL PUMPS WORK!

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