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Jesus

Breakfast of champions.

What'd you have for breakfast today, Billy?
I had myself a nice slice of Jesus.

by Kacei September 14, 2008

18๐Ÿ‘ 54๐Ÿ‘Ž


jesus

a mythological figure which is central to christianity.

there's no real evidence that jesus existed, in fact the whole jesus story seems to be based on older pagan myths.

"do you believe in jesus?"

"no, wtf. do you believe in the tooth fairy?"

by beeba March 1, 2005

114๐Ÿ‘ 202๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

1. The single most imporant human being in eternity and human history. We even have our calenders dated according to his existance.
2. The Lion of the Tribe of Judah
3. The Rose of Sharon
4. The Bright and Morning Star
5. The Messiah
6. The Son of God and 2nd personality of the Holy Trinity
7. The Prince of Peace
8. The Great Shepard
9. The Lamb of God that takes aways the world's sin.
10.The Rock of Ages

His miraculous birth was predicted in the Bible centuries prior. His Virgin Birth in Bethlehem was predicted in Micah 5:2. Try reading it. He was a Jew, born around 3 B.C. during the height of the Roman Empire in a province called Judeah to the Virgin Mary in the village of Bethlehem under King Herrod. A few days after his birth, wisemen came from the East to see the Christ Child and presented him with gifts. A week after his birth, he was given the name Emmanuel and circumsized in the synagouge. Shortly after that, his Earthly Father Joseph took him and his mother Mary to Egypt to escape King Herrod's wrath and homicidal plot aginst Jesus and all newborn children under the age of two. The Bible doesnt give us much information between that time and when he was Baptized by John the Baptist at the age of 30.

His birth, death on the cross and resurrection just outside Jerusalem was predicted in the Bible Centuries prior, not just to 100% accurracy, but Jesus himself predicted his own brutal death and resurrection. He rose from the dead and PROVED he was who he claimed to be--the Son of God and that we have hope if we put our faith in him. This proves he is THE way, THE truth and THE life.

Jesus is currently up in heaven in his perfected, resurrected body preparing a place for all those who love him. He will return to the Earth to establish his Kingdom and his people will rule and reign with him through all of eternity.

Jesus is the most influencial human being that has ever lived and will ever live. He sits at God the Father's right hand and rules and reigns over the universe that God has entrusted to him.

by krock1dk@yahoo.com November 4, 2007

135๐Ÿ‘ 80๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

A handsome, hard-working guy. He has amazing eyes that just with one wink any woman can fall head over heels. His smile may be the best thing in this world. His smile delightfully captivates and mesmerizes. He has a lot of sex appeal and he is modest about it although everyone around him can sense it. He is mysterious leaving people wanting more. Great lover. Great kisser. Not many now him deeply. He is friendly although considers only a few to be real friends. Spend a day with a Jesus and you'll want to spend the rest of your life with him.

Girl: "There is something about him that sends electricity through my veins. I want him."
Friend: "What is his name?"
Girl: "Jesus"

by catcha February 3, 2010

13๐Ÿ‘ 42๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

The world's first street magician.

-OMG dude did you see that jesus guy?

-Yeah man he does some crazy shit

by omfgsoab February 19, 2011

16๐Ÿ‘ 47๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

sum dude who gets blamed for everything

eg "JESUS, HES GOT A GUN!!!!!!!!!!!" or JESUS WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY MUM!!!

by piepie123 June 14, 2010

11๐Ÿ‘ 38๐Ÿ‘Ž


Jesus

A man who, like Selena, was a good and talented person who unfortunately has a crappy fan club.

"Jesus is just all right with me."-Doobie Brothers

by JohnJF February 17, 2008

23๐Ÿ‘ 59๐Ÿ‘Ž