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A person, living in the United States, who thinks that you should support the US government no matter what, unless a democrat is in office.
US Conservative while a republican is president: "You should always support your government, no matter what, and anyone who says different is a traitor and should just shut up."
US Conservative while a democrat is president: "I hope the president fails."
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A Conserv-absurd is an argument that provides poor reasoning in support of its conclusion. Conserv-absurds differ from other bad arguments in that right-wing people find these psychologically persuasive, and therefore mistakenly believe its conclusion to be true even though it’s false.
Examples of “If P then Q” Conserv-absurds:
“If you don’t support the war, you don’t support the troops.”
“If we fight them over there, we won’t have to fight them here.”
Frequently such illogical sound bites are made into bumper stickers, and the false information will be distributed via email (to catapult the propapoop). More recently this trend has increased among social conservatives.
For example, infidelity is okay IF:
1. You don’t do it in your office. If you have extramarital sex elsewhere like an airport restroom or another country, then it’s okay, even when done at the taxpayer’s or company’s expense.
2. There is reconciliation with your spouse, no matter how much you really hate each other. Especially when there are kids, no matter how much you fight in front of them. It’s better to pretend you have "family values" than to have family well-being.
3. You ask forgiveness, though you don’t regret cheating--just getting busted. It has nothing to do with merit, but rather the appearance of repentance.
4. You do it because you’re fed up with Obama.
Antonym - constipational
There they go again trying to blame everything on the “liberal media.” But Conserv-absurds are the real reason the country is going down the toilet!
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See also Conservative and Christian.
Christian Conservatives are the bane of American government. Systematically they role back civil rights as well as turn equal rights for women around 180 degrees. They tend to use the christian "god" as an excuse for thier bad behavior. As a hole, despite thier claims otherwise, these are the most sinful of all politicions. World renowed for fraud, genocide, and dishonesty twords their country's people, Christian Conservatives are generally heralded as "The one major political group that could single handedly demolish democracy".
"......Steal millions from a corporation? Have sex with a minor? Murder someone who doesn't have the same skin color, god, or sexual preference as myself?....No way! What do you think I am? A christian conservative?"
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Conservative, usually from the midwest, who has no taste whatsoever for the exotic and clings to tradition like a dog to a bone.
The cornflake conservative beat his wife when he learnt that she bought fruit loops.
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A gradually growing instagram account that surrounds politics and memes.
Did you see the debate that Conservative Tween was in?
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A person who is politically conservative, yet cultivates a healthy suspicion of mass culture, as well as an appreciation for aesthetics and cultural artifacts that would normally be associated with leftist leanings.
Wayne's Birkenstocks and his taste for organically grown vegetables belied his granola conservative beliefs.
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1. A person who thrives on a capitalist based income such as sales or rental revenue but prefers to vote for liberal figures or policies which may not align with their financial goals.
2. A person who does not openly admit that they would vote conservatively out of fear that they might be ostracized by their liberal peers.
1. I am an income property investor and I rely on a strong rental revenue stream to maintain my portfolio, however I feel that open borders are an important human right so I vote Liberal. You might call me a "Closet Conservative"
2. My friends are all staunch liberals, some of them are Antifa members so I can't admit to them that I voted Republican or they might disown me... or worse...
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