Fig-eta Bout It Burger

A specialized burger that comes with figs!

"Hey Bob, what's the burger of the day?" "It's the Fig-eta Bout It Burger, it's served with figs!"

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I don't give a fig

It means, I don't give a fuck

I don't give a fig if you own a PhD in International Relations, I am the boss here!

I want a fig newton

this means that you are looking to hook up.. I want to fuck you

If mouthed silently this looks like I want to fuck you so mouth the word I want a fig newton at someone you want to hook up with

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tig ol fig bitties

It is a descreit/backwards way to say 'big ol fake tits'.

A woman with huge breasts and a small, tiny figure. That one can probably conclude that her breasts are fake; one would describe her as a woman with 'tig ol fig bitties'.

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Trigger Fig Nooner Beat

A phrase meaning, "No, there is not a polar bear in my freezer."

Emily: Hey Kari, What class do you have next?

Kari: TRIGGER FIG NOONER BEAT!

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fart fig neuton

n. the great relief you feel after eating an imported German fruit filled cookie.
From the german - fahren - drive hard; drive fast

"Man, I was all clogged up - but after those German cookies I really have fart fig neuton."

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douche big a fig a lig

Someone who is actually worse than, a Douche, a Fag, and someone with just one leg. All wrapped into one.

"I got $5 on a 50 yard dash, you smelly homo!" douche big a fig a lig.

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