office hands

The guy who is always borrowing peoples' stuff, mostly office supplies

(Like staplers, paperclips, pens, etc.)

Bill: Hey man can I borrow a pen, I forgot mine, and I don't want my boss to fire me.
Barry: You and your office hands never show us mercy.
Bill: What?

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wasted hand

Verb. The act of being excessively high.

Mike: "chris, I'm high but not in my brain"
Chris: "mike, I think you're f*cking wasted hand"
Mike: "I must be wasted hand"

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hands of silk

a genetic physical advantage in football allowing one to catch anything.

Hazlett dropped the fucking hammer on the other team using his hands of silk snagging everything. It was steak sauce.

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Hand babies

Male masturbation

Nathan was caught making hand babies at the computer

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Hand Hug

masterbation

dude i wake up every morning and give myself a hand hug

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hand grenade

A gesture thrown by hand thumbs up or thumb up if only using one hand, ie the Fonz. A final affirmation for when everything is spot on. (Friendship goes with a bang!)

When you look at your hand in the thumbs up gesture side on, if you look closely at the four curled fingers that go into the palm and notice the edge of the knuckles it looks very much like the classic early Hand Grenade known as the pineapple hand grenade. Now looking back at your hand in the thumbs up gesture if you curl over your thumb and imagine its inside the ring that’s joined onto the pin, then move your thumb up as if to remove the pin thumbs up BOOM. A hand gesture thrown by the hand grenade Friendship goes with a bang!

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Ass Hands

When your hands both look and feel like ass. A bizarre peeling condition when the skin on your hands peels off and grow back and the process repeats itself.

I am embarassed by my ass hands, they make it difficult to touch other people.

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